Gordon Dickson was once Bank of Scotland’s risk officer. His career spanned several decades and made him a nice chunk of money. Then the crisis happened, the shares he’d bought over thirty years collapsed, he fell into a depression and declared he wanted nothing to do with this godforsaken industry. But he needed to find meaning in something and he needed a source of income (having previously relied on dividend payments that were no longer). And that’s when he turned to pirates. Read more »
“The Chief Executive Of The British Bankers Association joins us on the line, Angela Knight. You’ve said that bankers are treated like lepers and carriers of bird flu. Do you not think that is no doubt because your members took huge sums of taxpayer money, caused a collapse of the economy, which is leading so some of the biggest cuts in public spending that we can ever remember and while the country suffers, your members take bonuses like nothing has happened? Is not then understandable that bankers are treated in that way?” [BBC]
I’m not promoting alcoholism, but like so many things in life, there are some activities many of you are better at while under the influence. Sadly, in London, one guy had to ruin it for the whole group. Steve Perkins, the oil trader who bought 7.13 million barrels of crude oil on behalf of his firm after “a drunken golf weekend” has been fined £72,000 and banned from the industry for a minimum of 5 years.
The 34-year-old, who lives in Brentwood, was a senior trader for PVM in the West End when he went on his spree last June. Working from a laptop at home after a weekend playing golf, he was able to move the oil market by engaging in huge amounts of speculative buying at ever-higher prices. In a statement, the FSA said: “Mr Perkins’ explanation for his trading on 29 and 30 June is that he was drunk. He says that he drank heavily throughout the weekend and continued drinking from around mid-day on Monday 29 June. He claims to have limited recollection of events.”
Hedge Fund Investor Relations Girl Loses Suit Against Boss For Dumb Blonde Jokes, Lap Dances, Alleged Murder AttemptsBy Bess Levin
Remember Jordan Wimmer and her boss Mark Lowe, manager of UK-based Nomos Capital? For those of you who (shamefully) need a recap, last fall Wimmer, a former investor relations girl who made £577,000 a year, sued Lowe for £4million, making a host of claims that included Lowe:
* Making jokes about the intelligence of blondes:
She said that Mr Lowe made derogatory ‘dumb blonde’ comments and would email ‘a series of offensive jokes’ to the whole team at Nomos. ‘They portrayed women, particularly blonde women, as objects and having no intelligence.’
* Employing unorthodox pick-up lines:
She claimed Mr Lowe…told her he did not find her attractive. However, she said he would still ‘invade her space’ and tried to kiss her at a hotel in Milan.
* Hiring prostitutes:
Miss Wimmer said her boss used the services of ‘high class prostitutes’ who he brought to business meetings. Describing one meeting in Hong Kong, she said: ‘Ling wore hot-pants that barely covered her buttocks, stilettos and no stockings.’
* And implying that the job of hooker and IR gal are basically interchangeable:
Miss Wimmer said she felt demeaned by Mr Lowe creating the impression that Ling ‘was part of the Nomos outfit’ and did the same job as her.
* The matter of having to be present while Lowe (the specimenat left) got a lap dance: Read more »
Congratulations! Your decision to annoy the British makes you part of a long and storied tradition of irritating foreigners with deep-rooted superiority complexes and a sense of smug entitlement. Their particular disposition makes the British a popular target. This program will give you the tools you need to successfully and expertly annoy the British in a cost effective manner.
The key to annoying the British is to understand the particular idiosyncrasies that make them vulnerable to agitation. Four consistently successful themes include:
1. The Irish
2. Competition or “Unsportsmanlike Play”
3. Internal Political Strife
4. Capital Flight
The British Bankers Association is to deliver a letter to the Government complaining about the legislation extending state-backed guarantees for all deposits held in Irish banks.
In a statement, the Association says the move has distorted competition and put banks in other jurisdictions, especially in Northern Ireland, as a competitive disadvantage. British banks have complained that the legislation would distort competition.
There are reports that money is being moved to Irish institutions from the UK.
Scheme ‘problem for UK’ [RTE Business]
The British are annoyed. It seems the brand London Interbank Offered Rate (“LIBOR”) has been somewhat sullied. Just about everyone sensitive to interest rates has had the bad news broken to them that LIBOR is the source of their ills. In the equation “LIBOR plus 2%” the “2%” isn’t the problem. LIBOR is.
Well, that’s not all of it. You see, the Brits are responsible for Structured Investment Vehicles too. Nicholas Sossidis and Stephen Partridge-Hicks are generally “blamed” for introducing us all to that particular bit balance sheet smoke and mirrors. You guessed it. Brits.
But then, it is sort of hard not to want to resent LIBOR as a structure, given its recently revealed susceptibility to manipulation by, ahem, Brits.
As for SIVs, there is nothing more reprehensible than giving Americans more excuses to move liabilities off of balance sheets without actually removing them off of balance sheets. Damn Brits.
NYBor [FT Alphaville]