“Hedge funds and private equity funds are secretive pools of capital blah blah blah,” people always say, and there’s some truth to that. But it’s partly true partly because a certain discretion is required by law. Banging on publicly about how awesome your hedge fund is could be taken as a “general solicitation” for investors, which was (and still is!) verboten, though nobody at CNBC takes that risk particularly seriously. But now that’s changing, sort of, sometime, with the JOBS Act, which will eventually allow hedge funds and private equity funds to advertise to the many though still only sell to the few.
Carlyle Group is now selling to the slightly-more-few via a Central Park Advisers feeder fund called CPG Carlyle Private Equity Fund, with a minimum of just $50,000. In keeping with no-general-solicitation rules, the Confidential Memorandum describing the CPGCPEF “is intended solely for the use of the person to whom it has been delivered for the purpose of evaluating a possible investment by the recipient in the Units of the Fund described herein, and is not to be reproduced or distributed to any other persons,” but it is also filed with the SEC. It’s super secret! It’s only available to anyone with a computer!
Are your pants getting a little tight? Have you become convinced mirrors have a personal vendetta against you? Are you too distracted by the rolls spilling over your belt to trade? Do you find yourself veering off course in your letters to investors to talk about your love handles? Is it only a matter of time before you lose your firm billions and/or take down the entire market because your fingers are so big they span four keys each on the keyboard?
Do you want to do something about it but are repulsed by the idea of healthy eating and exercise and also know yourself well enough to realize that there is no way you’re going to be able to stay strong if everyone around you is eating solid food at lunch and sooner or later you, a usually pretty mild-mannered guy, will be leaping across a row of Bloomberg terminals and threatening to kill a coworker (and meaning it) unless he hands over Ho Ho now? Then round up your similarly tubby colleagues and tell them they’re in for a real treat. Read more »
Eeevil conspiracy theory source The Carlyle Group filed for its IPO today, which makes sense because the best time to file for an IPO is during a global financial meltdown (better than filing in normal times and launching your roadshow into a meltdown, or not). The not so great news: they’re too private equity-y for some people. Bloomberg reports:
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If you love a good conspiracy theory but find Ron Paul’s and Rick Perry’s calls to kill Ben Bernanke for counterfeiting a little played out, do we have some good news for you. The Carlyle Group, a mild mannered private equity firm by day that at night transforms into an evil conspiracy among George Bush, Skull & Bones, the Saudi royal family annd the Illuminati, is about to get a lot more public attention.
Bloomberg reports that Carlyle is shopping an IPO. While we do worry that IPOs by smart private equity managers have a pretty solid tradition of top-ticking (Blackstone IPOed in June 2007 and the market has never been the same since), we like David Rubenstein’s efforts to get valued for making good investments instead of just for having a ton of money:
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Jimmy Lee, JPMorgan’s legendary dealmaker, just finished up on CNBC’s new show, Strategy Session. Not only did he say the credit markets “are wide open,” but he said up to $10 billion in debt is now available for a big LBO, provided it sits on top of about $5 billion in equity and is, of course, the right kind of company. That jibes with what Carlyle Group’s David Rubenstein told the Washington Post earlier this week.