Remember Debrahlee Lorenzana? For those with short memories, two years ago, Lorenzana sued Citibank for firing her for allegedly being “too hot,” a claim representatives of the bank denied several times, while also calling her an attention whore. After the initial hoopla, interest in Lorenzana, who once appeared on a TV show discussing her reasons for having her breasts enlarged (she wanted to look like “tits on a stick” in order to attract a “professional, well-educated man”) died down and many likely forgot about the story of T’s on an S versus Citi. In a Daily News article today, though, Debs said that she passed on a settlement wanting instead to “press on.” While it’s not clear that anyone reading the piece took it to mean Lorenzana had in fact received damages for her hotness, Citi was not having it. Lest there be any confusion about whether or not she extracted jack from Vikram et al, the bank needs the world to know the following: Read more »
The Satisfaction Of Punching Each Other In The Face Was Totally Worth $20 Million to JPMorgan And Goldman SachsBy Matt Levine
When we saw that three boutique banks represented Google and Motorola Mobility in their deal, we were a little puzzled about why. Not that it’s unusual to hire Lazard, Centerview or Qatalyst, but after reading Felix Salmon‘s lament for the breathless pre-market M&A scoop we wondered if that supplied the explanation. Maybe Google and Motorola left out the big banks because they have kind of a deserved reputation for leaking deals, and because keeping news quiet is easier at a smaller shop than at a place with thousands of public-side employees? But on further inspection that theory kind of fell apart, as trading in MMI suggests that the deal may have leaked last week.
The New York Post has what seems to be the correct explanation: Motorola had actually spent a lot of time with full-service bulge bracket investment banks recently, and had come to the considered conclusion that they’re all a bunch of dicks.
Read more »
Yesterday we discussed George Soros’ love life. Specifically his dealings with 28 year-old Brazilian soap star Adriana Ferreyr. After 5 years of what she describes as a “serious and meaningful relationship” (while Soros’ lawyer characterized it as “on-again, off-again and non-exclusive”), Soros promised to buy her an apartment on East 85th Street. He broke things off with Ferreyr a couple days after signing the papers on the pad and then, during pillow talk during one night of “reconciliation,” he allegedly whispered to her that he’d let other woman named Tamikoa Bolton move into her “dream home.” Bad idea! Ferreyr let him know she was pissed, feelings she claims he responded to by attempting to choke her and flinging a lamp at her foot. Now she wants $50 million from Soros and would probably also like the bitch who stole her man to find a new place to live because quite awkwardly, Ferreyr and Bolton are now both living in the building, Bolton in 7C, Ferreyr a few floors down (if Soros, who lives two blocks away and was apparently “furious that Ferreyr found a lease in the building,” thought he was going to be able to get rid of her so quickly, he was sorely mistaken). This has proven slightly awkward.
Things became so testy between the rival women at 30 E. 85th St. — when the scorned Ferreyr managed to rent another apartment there — that each accused the other of harassment, according to court papers. The passive-aggressive catfight between the sultry actress and the sexy licensed pharmacist escalated to the point that Bolton began “slandering her to the board of the building, the management company, doormen and lawyers,” Ferreyr charges in her lawsuit.
While you’d think that a grown-up soap star and sexy licensed pharmacist could put their feelings for the Hungarian hunk of man meat aside, we fear that this is only the beginning and the beginning of the end of their residency in the building. It starts with talking shit to the doorman and you know where it goes from there? Read more »
As mentioned last week, analyst Mike Mayo has been going around telling clients and whoever else will listen that the bank is inflating its profits and needs to a write down $50 billion of deferred-tax assets. For the offense, Citi has, according to Charlie Gasparino, frozen Mayo out. No one-on-ones in Pandit’s office, no phone interviews, and he’s even blocked from Uncle Vik on IM, which has got to chap some serious hide. On Friday, fellow analyst Dick Bové inserted himself into the situation, coming out and claiming Mayo be talking shit, and that Citi is “not cooking the books.” Today, Mayo went on.
“We believe that Citigroup’s financial targets can encourage short-term excesses over long-term prudence,” Mayo wrote in a note to clients titled “A Matter of Trust.” Mayo, an analyst at the securities firm CLSA, added: “Citi has an aggressive financial target of 5% asset growth when so much of its past problems stem from excessive asset growth.”
If Miss FDIC thought the Rochdale analyst had her back she was sorely mistaken. Read more »
Jim Cramer’s Bear Call Was Second Worst Prediction Of The Decade, Says Fellow CNBC Colleague (UPDATED)By Bess Levin
CNBC, like any other organization, has typically followed the rule that while you might despise your colleagues, any trash talk about them being idiots or whores is done privately. United front and all that crap.* So, for instance, we’ve yet to hear anyone from the network agree with the generally accepted belief that Jim Cramer’s bold call your money was safe with Bear Stearns back in March 2008, because “Bear Stearns is fine,” was one of his greats, and by greats we mean worst calls of all time, second only to the public declaration that Lenny Dykstra is the best money manager in town. Then this morning, we got this:
And it raises a few questions, such as:
1. Does David Faber have a death wish?
2. Is this the beginning of something beautiful, wherein everyone at CNBC just starts turning on one another?
2a. And we finally find out who leaked Maria’s high school nickname to the Post?
2b. And Sue Herrera’s true thoughts on Michelle’s Caruso Cabreras?
3. Is someone going to have his tires slashed?
4. Can we get Faber to say this to JC’s face, on air?
5. WILL JIM CRAMER ADDRESS THIS AFFRONT ON TODAY’S STOP TRADING SEGMENT? And will it go something like this, but with the word “Faber” swapped for “they”?
Cramer: Bear Stearns [Newsweek]
*Any if you absolutely must leak your feelings to the media, you do so as an anonymous source.
UPDATE: Newsweek has changed the byline to Arlyn Gajilan, one of their editors. Why? Because David Faber was asked to simply write a piece on the fall of Bear Stearns. Newsweek, we’re told, then inserted the Cramer angle and used it for the list. Faber, kind of understandably, was not happy about this, and after what was probably an awkward conversation with Cramer, the byline was changed. So Newsweek is now in the business of instigating shit which is interesting.