The short answer: there’s more money in a site called GoSuck.It and he’s going to start managing some money again for some of his “very wealthy friends.” [MarketWatch]
Cody Willard
Your devastating news of the day/week/month (fuck it, year): Fox Business has canceled Happy Hour. At this time it’s reportedly “unclear” as to how the three hosts will be affected but it’s obvious CW’s gonna need a home. Who among you are wiling to take him in? Here’s a quick list of what he brings to the table:
1) As the founder of a hedge fund that at one time had as much as $5,000 in assets under management, is considered one of the greatest minds on Wall Street.
2) Is a voracious Twitter’er and could possibly manage your account
3) IS CHILDHOOD FRIENDS WITH NEIL PATRICK HARRIS, who would probably stop by your office at least once if his little buddy was given a desk there. Continue reading »
Cody Willard needs no introduction, nor do his qualifications but I’m going to give them to you anyway: the man hosts a show about business in a bar. He once owned a hedge fund where he managed slightly more than $1,000 in assets under management. He kind of knows what short-selling is. For all those reason and more, and I don’t think anyone will disagree with me here, we believe Willard is uniquely qualified to offer you “revolutionary” advice on investing. So fuck Maria Bartiromo. Get your money back from Lenny Dykstra, if he hasn’t already spent it on Twizzlers and dip. Through his “unconventional” investment strategies, CDubs is gonna line your pocket with singles– maybe even 20s, if you play your cards right.
I’m going to present this one without commentary. To parse it would be to meddle with its genius (genius that, if it’s doing its job right, will haunt your dreams). I will however put a few things in bold that I think you should look out for:
Most people understand that shorting something means you’ll make money if it goes down. Here’s how it actually works:
It’s Saturday afternoon and you stop by your ex girlfriend’s apartment to pick some of your old stuff. You guys are friends and all, so you just let yourself in. You’re grabbing your clothes from behind the fridge and see that she’s got a case of Budweiser sitting in the pantry next to it. You happen to be on your way to a pool party and you know that your frat boy friends will be out of beer by the time you make your “casually late” entrance.
- Use the Bloomberg command
NH BLG_DEALBREAKER <GO>
to access Dealbreaker
