The good: bonus time come early! The not as good: no touching. Read more »
Henrietta Leung slaved away for nine years at HSBC, taking home 120,000 pounds annually for 16-hour work days. Then she did the same for Credit Suisse. All the while she knew something was missing but couldn’t justifiably give up the money. Then the financial crisis and her ensuing layoff from the Swiss Bank did for her what she couldn’t do for herself: forced her to figure out what makes Henrietta tick. She found that tick was a) being naked and b) doing squat thrusts, sometimes simultaneously. Read more »
Prop trading at Credit Suisse plans to cut around 30% of traders in the near term.
A couple weeks ago a second year Tech analyst at Credit Suisse got drunk, returned to the office, and entered a colleague’s cubicle. Apparently having not been made aware when he was first hired that destruction of company property is frowned upon at this particular bank, here’s what happened next.
From: [redacted at Credit Suisse]
To: IBD TMT Analysts NY; IBD TMT Associates NY
Subject: Bullpen incident over weekend
The attached picture was sent to me by Corporate Services and HR. This is nothing short of embarrassing for our group and something that the Firm takes very seriously. Vandalism of company property will result in disciplinary action leading up to, and including, termination of employment.
We all work in a corporate environment – not a college dorm – if you cannot behave in a professional and respectful manner, you should consider alternative employment.
Credit Suisse Overestimating Just How Much US-Based Employees Care About Swiss Hockey Team, Underestimating How Many Will Pretend To In Order To Get Out Of WorkBy Bess Levin
If management had accurate figures for the latter, we’re pretty sure they would’ve opened up a few more auditoriums/conference rooms and/or called ahead to a bunch of bars to let ‘em know CS employees have been given the rest of the day off to watch US vs. Switzerland game. Two hundred and twenty five seats (and no booze) is not going to cut it. To that end, question for the group– is this sort of generosity making other banks look bad or is everyone doing it? Did Deutsche Bank call off work yesterday to watch the Canadians rout the Krauts? Has RBC pulled the plug for the entirety of the games?
If you answered “an auction that takes place in the Netherlands,” you’re not alone.
Erin Callan took a leave of absence from her job at Credit Suisse over a year ago. Since then, we’d heard nary a peep from the old girl. In our minds we knew she’d likely extended her vacation to something more permanent, but in our hearts we hoped against hope to wake up one morning and see her going at it with David Einhorn on Squawk Box, or posing in front of black cars in the Wall Street Journal. Today Charlie “I’m gonna nut in Maria Bartiromo et al’s eyes” Gasparino has crushed that dream. The ace reporter, working the phones all morning, delivers this devastating blow sure to rock your world: “Callan has formally ‘retired’ from the securities business, according to people with knowledge of the matter.” The situation is not fluid.
See if you can guess what happens next.
It would be difficult to make the case that, over the last decade or so, financial institutions haven’t begun to resemble the sovereigns that purport to regulate them. Certainly, with the news that the spying scandal brewing at Deutsche Bank is wider than initially realized, it becomes more and more obvious that global financial institutions have begun, also, to act like sovereigns, particularly with respect to the creation and use of intelligence services. For what it’s worth, 2008 revenues at Goldman outpace the Gross National Product (much less the tax receipts) of Panama, Estonia and Iceland- and the odd alien visitor could be forgiven for thinking that this latter had outsourced its central bank function to any of three global banks. (Take your pick).
Sovereigns are playing right along, sending their agents to penetrate and gather intelligence on Swiss banks (Germany, we are looking at you) as if they were the Abwehr, and though it might look like the United States has concluded swaps with Schweizerische Nationalbank, those transactions might as well be directly with UBS and Credit Suisse. And who would argue that the United States Department of State is really negotiating primarily with the Swiss Government, rather than UBS, on the issue of naming U.S. depositors? Of course, the result here (no fine for You and Us) reminds one of treaty negotiations more than a regulatory probe. But, then, when two or three big banks have the power to make (or break) the country’s economy, what’s the difference?
Bank Scandal Widens [The Wall Street Journal]
Possibly, according to an employee of the less tax evade-y Swiss bank in town, who overheard the change being discussed by management in an 11 Madison Avenue elevator last night. Obviously don’t get too excited, though, as it’s not really going to translate to more money (or ability to make payments to the bank of your ex-wife)– apparently the increase in salary comes with a decrease in bonus (putting the Douganettes in good company.)