“You’re a farmer. You can’t control the weather. When you make a Brunello, you have to follow a set of rules. One is no interference with nature. You can’t irrigate in a dry year. I happen to like traditional methods. I’m kind of old school. If you’re someone who balks at following rules, you can still make wine, but you can’t call it a Brunello. You might want a vineyard in Napa Valley instead.” [BusinessWeek]
Is Mike Mayo the most powerful man on Wall Street, able to bend CEOs and bank chairmen to his will with the greatest of ease? If you’d asked earlier this week or even yesterday we would have said, “Well he does have a varsity analyst jacket but eh.” Today? The answer is we have no idea but Dick Parsons is certainly helping make that case by not only complying with Mayo’s demands but doing so on his specified time schedule. [WSJ, Earlier: “I think that Parsons should leave in the next two weeks,” said Mayo on Feb. 23]
“We’re not up to the level of earnings and profitability and sustained, responsible growth we know we can get this thing to,” Parsons told CNBC, ahead of the bank’s annual meeting in New York City. “I think that’s the assignment for this year.” [CNBC]
As the Chairman of Citigroup, a position he’s held since February 2009, Dick Parsons sticks out a bit by comparison. Whereas Citi has at times been the world’s largest bloated, lumbering, diversified cathouse where, for a good while, nothing could go right, a highly flammable entity prone to one chaotic moment of shit hitting the fan after the next, that few wanted to get within 100 feet of Parsons is calm. Cool. “Flat-out smooth,” as BusinessWeek describes him (which is why he was hired to be the one to go make nice with Washington, according to Vikram Pandit). The magazine recently accompanied Dick to a jazz club where they got to know him a little better, on a personal level. Here’s what we’ve learned about DP:
* He thinks the city smoking ban sucks: “Michael E. Novogratz, a director of Fortress Investment Group, a New York hedge fund, gives Parsons a hug and presents him with a Montecristo cigar. Parsons looks pleased. “Oh man,” he says, “I wish we could light these up in here.”
* If you’ve lost ass-ton of money, he’s the guy you turn to for a pick-me-up: Novogratz and Parsons exchange condolences about the market, which is zig-zagging with the turmoil in the Middle East. “I lost more money this week than I did in any week in 2008,” Novogratz laments. Parsons tells him not to be so hard on himself. “Nobody knows what’s going on,” he says.
* Charm like this doesn’t need an undergraduate degree: He went to the University of Hawaii, where he partied more than he studied. After four years, he still needed six credits to get his diploma, but he discovered that if he aced his pre-law exams he could get into law school in New York state without a college degree. He did well on the test and was accepted to Albany Law School, where he graduated at the top of his class. Read more »
Pretty simple, really: nobody else has the skills to destroy investment banks, investor capital, etc. You think any shmoe on the corner could do that? I think not. Just like the NFL. Read more »
The Citi Chairman told Bloomberg today that his little CEO that could has done “a tremendous job” but “has not been given the credit that is due to him and his team. His team being all the people of Citi.” So take two today to figure out how to tell the Citi employee in your life you’re proud of the work they’ve done. Whether it involves jumping out of a cake naked or one of those mini desk Zen Gardens with card that says “One day you’ll get the life-sized version,” the thought alone would mean a lot to Dick.
Sooo…this happened. Don’t worry, though, they’re gonna be conferenced in and won’t miss a thing (and Blankfein will get to do it sans pants, as is his wont. Everybody wins). Other excuses they considered going with:
* All three had cramps (they’re on the same cycle)
* Car trouble
* Too hung over
* Just not feeling it
* Blankfein had to wash his hair
* Your call
Citi Chairman Dick Parsons is on board with the whole $45 billion TARP repayment thing, but isn’t quite so brazen as to issue a timetable that the bank will never meet. But this is not to say that Citi doesn’t have a credible, well thought out plan for addressing its massive bailout.
Parson said Citi recently filed with the government a capital plan that outlines the bank’s strategy going forward for repaying TARP.
He declined to give the specifics of the strategy, but said “so much of it will depend on the cooperation of the markets.”