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From a friend of DB:
“Bess– [Redacted] was seated next to me at [Manhattan restaurant] last night. I figured given the shitstorm Wall Street’s been through the last couple years he’d keep shop talk to a minimum. But, he didn’t hold back; I wasn’t making an effort to eavesdrop, but he’s not exactly the softest speaking gent in town and the tables are way too damn close. Anyway, his four main points I picked up:
UBS lost a lot of money over the last few years. Some might call it as metric-ass tons of money, others will say shit-tons. Whatever, the point is, it was a lot. A whole lot. The Swiss bank has recently begun a PR offensive that involves the message “it will not rest” until it regains its rightful place as the most majestic bank in all the land but do they have an actual plan re: how they’re gonna make the back? It appears they do. Continue reading »
As you may have heard, Albany is currently debating whether or not to lay a $50 million tax upon the asses of certain hedge fund managers. Though nothing is set it stone yet, said managers are none too pleased with the proposal and have aired their grievances in public. Sensing friction on the home-front, Connecticut Governor Jodi Rell has jumped all over the situation. Earlier this month she conveyed, in her own words, a “simple yet heartfelt message” (which was “Connecticut welcomes you”) and now she’s hoping to win the boys over with raw meat, having invited Timothy Selby, president of the New York Hedge Fund Roundtable, and all of his friends, to an “intimate” steak dinner. Continue reading »
BofA ML has bumped its dinner at the office allowance to a whopping $25, up from $20. It’s a small consolation for those who signed up for the gig under the assumption they’d be serving at the pleasure of Ken Lewis, but it’s something.
Following his pit-stop for wings in Buffalo yesterday, Obama spoke at a campaign fundraiser at The St. Regis hotel, which you might’ve assumed would be attended by top Wall Street brass. Jamie, since they’re buds. Lloyd, because he has to. Vikram, because his plans always fall through. But you would’ve assumed wrong! The bank CEO’s decided they were all good and opted not to pay the $50,000 entrance fee to hear the prez talk about buzz-kill topics like “reform” and “responsibility” (he also said “there are a lot of good people who work in the financial industry who do things the right way,” so they missed out on that free ego boost). Continue reading »
The Post writes today that Jon Corzine’s dinner at Elio’s the other night was ruined by the presence of Charlie Gasparino. Supposedly, because of an appearance on CNBC a few years ago in which Chaz “sandbagged” the then governor of New Jersey over raising taxes, JSC is absolutely terrified of CG. Apparently the mere mention of Gasparino’s name, and the no-holds barred journalism that comes along with it, sends shivers up Corzine’s spine and being in the same room as the take no prisoners reporter results in the new MF Global chief doing some serious quaking in his boots. Continue reading »
Pretty incredible dinner news from the House of JPMorgan today. None of you will be dining by candlelight while gazing into the eyes of five o’clock shadow over here (you wish) but: that heartless cost-cutting initiative from back in May, that decreed Seamless web orders “shall not exceed $20″? Repealed! Oh, that’s right my little Dimonettes– for those of you eating at your desk tonight, feel free to go crazy ’cause your meal allowance has been bumped back up to $25. You should count yourselves really, really lucky regardless, but especially compared to your counterparts elsewhere on the Street, such as Goldman, which we’re pretty sure has yet to throw an extra fiver at its employees after this insult last fall, and Citi, where employees who believe themselves too good to eat cat food go hungry.
Update: A Citi dweller takes issue with the above and would like me to pass on the following: “We are still at $25 and despite multiple inflows from the gov never cut back on food. Can we print in color? No. Can we get a cab at a reasonable hour? No. But damn it no cat food for us!”
Update II: Okay, this isn’t even funny. Guys, fuck the cat food jokes, they wish they were eating the wet stuff at RBS. The Queen’s biatches apparently had their allowance dropped to $8 including tax and tip after the UK gov took an active interest in business. Supposedly there was a recent unofficial announcement that the policy was changing to $20 but so far nothing in writing. Fingers crossed.
