Those of you who are familiar with superhero culture know that there is always a downside to have special powers. Sure, there are the highs of being able to, for instance, fight crime and fly, but more often than not, you can’t have a normal life and often times are forced to put aside the people and things you love in order to use your gift for the greater good of society. Spiderman and Batman, for example, at various times in their lives had to give up being with the women they loved due to concerns for their safety and because it wasn’t fair to the girls, always being put second to humanity, which needed their respective man’s help. Someone who knows this conflict all too well? Jeffrey Gundlach. Read more »
A lot people would probably tell you that bond investor Jeffrey Gundlach’s awesomeness stems from the staggeringly impressive sex toy and porn collection he kept in his office at TWC before he was fired/quit last year (itemized here). And while being Wall Street’s foremost dildo collector and having the entire Dr. Fellatio series, as in volumes 1-16, on hand is certainly something to admire someone for, it’s not actually the attribute that defines Gundlach or makes him stand out from the pack. Arguably, JG’s most defining characteristic– the one that just makes you want to squeeze his cheeks– is how much Jeffrey Gundlach loves himself some Jeffrey Gundlach. Read more »
According to an updated federal filing on Monday, the Justice Department has taken an interest in the split between investment firm TCW Group and its former CIO, Jeffrey Gundlach. While DoubleLine has confirmed that “some employees and former employees have been interviewed by the office of the U.S. attorney in Manhattan” and TCW has confirmed it received a subpoena and was informed “it is the victim in this particular matter,” it’s unclear exactly what aspect of the breakup the government is suspicious about. With so much to choose from it could be a) “the alleged theft of TCW’s information” by Gundlach, who left to start DoubleLine LLC b) whether or not government information related to a PPIP fund TCW dropped out of after Gundlach departed was “compromised” or c) if the items found in Gundlach’s office after he quit/was fired constituted an unfair edge, which they very well might have. To refresh, these items included:
Asian Office Sluts
Weapons of Ass Destruction Read more »
Congratulations are in order for Jeff Gundlach and the DoubleLine Team! In addition to being ranked number one globally in asses (on tape), the new firm has gathered the most assets among 2010 fund launches. Naturally this calls for a celebration and a screening of Ass Traffic Volume 2 at the office would probably be most fitting, if anyone has a copy lying around. Read more »
That’s at least the story the dildo collector told Bloomberg so okay, sure. Other things “The Godfather” (also known as “The Pope“) got off his chest include:
* The fact that he is, as previously stated, a genius:
“I am amazingly brilliant analytically,” says Gundlach, a wiry man whose short brown hair hugs his skull like a helmet.
* That the drugs, paraphernalia (“bearing evidence of recent use”), 12 sexual “devices,” 34 “hardcore pornographic magazines,” and 36 “hardcore sexually explicit DVDs and videocassettes” found in his former offices at TCW were nothing, and that attempts to use them in order to make him look bad were cheap, since it’s not like he had them scattered about the place.
Here’s your hint: the question came from someone not only known by colleagues as a dick, but a lover of dick as well. Chrome, rubber, glass, whatever. Okay, guess.
Double fist pump for DoubleLine LLC! Earlier this week, when we discussed the matter of Jeffrey Gundlach, who’s being sued by his former employer, TCW, for conspiracy, unfair competition, theft of proprietary and having dozens upon dozens of dildos, hardcore pornos, spank rags and weed in his office, a few of you wondered if there would be any sort of fall-out for Gunds. Would his new clients take issue with his admission to keeping, among other things, Weapons of Ass Destruction, Dr. Fellatio 16, a 6-inch brown rubber penis, an 8-inch glass penis and a pink and black strap restraining device in his office? Would the colleagues who followed him out the door of TCW be regretting their decision? No word yet on how clients feel about all this but apparently the defectors like it just fine and they’ve convinced their friends to get on board the Trip Down Mammary Lane train. At least 7 TCW employees have joined the new shop as of yesterday.