Do you want to take on a man who would rather shave off his eyebrows than pay his ex-wife a dime? Do you relish the opportunity to oppose an army of highly-paid corporate lawyers with tens of thousands times the resources at their disposal? Are you not spooked by the prospect of serving as the third in a series of lawyers on a case? Then give Patricia Cohen a call. Read more »
dream gigs
Unhappy in your current position and desperate to make a move? Completely content but looking for opportunities for professional growth? Today’s your lucky day. Patriarch Partners founder and CEO Lynn Tilton, she of Christmas cards, jello shots, whipped cream off her breasts, and “The number one lie people tell is ‘I won’t come in your mouth‘” fame is looking for a personal assistant. Think you’re up for the challenge? Here are the non-negotiable prerequisites and responsibilities you’ll face (emphasis ours): Read more »
You Don’t Become The World’s Leading Hedge Fund Manager Without Learning To Delegate The Most Critical Of Tasks
By Bess Levin
How does a nanny earn more than the average pediatrician? The simple answer is hard work — plus a strange seller’s market that follows a couple of quirky economic principles. A typical high-priced nanny effectively signs her (and they are almost always women) life over to the family she works for…And, alas, it seems that there just aren’t enough “good” nannies, always on call, to go around. Especially since a wealthy family’s demands can be pretty specific. According to Pavillion’s vice president, Seth Norman Greenberg, a nanny increases her market value if she speaks fluent French (or, increasingly, Mandarin); can cook a four-course meal (and, occasionally, macrobiotic dishes); and ride, wash and groom a horse. Greenberg has also known families to prize nannies who can steer a 32-foot boat, help manage an art collection or, in one case, drive a Zamboni to clean a private ice rink. [NYT via BI, related]
Former Occupy Wall Street Protester Can Sleep At Night Knowing Few People Would Recognize Her New Employer As Being On Wall Street
By Bess Levin
Other than when writing Penthouse forum entries or relaying tales of experimentation with barnyard animals, it’s not often that people tell stories which include the words “I never thought I’d be doing this.” On that note, remember John Thomas Financial? To recap, it’s a four year-old brokerage best known for being run by a guy (Thomas Belesis) who 1) last year took it upon himself to organize a “rally” to “bring back the pride of Wall Street” (which marked the first time anyone that worked on Wall Street had heard of the place) and 2) May have wanted to bring back not only pride but the sort of corporate culture that accepted, nay, encouraged “lesbian strippers on the trading floor,” a lack of judgement re: “virtual hailstorms of sexual harassment,” and a can-do attitude from junior employees when “assigned to mop up the whipped cream and bodily fluids resulting from an exec’s midday frolic with his secretary,” as was the case as his former firm. Anyway, JTF is back in the news on account of trolling Occupy Wall Street for employees and finding one in Tracy Postert, who apparently wouldn’t have accepted the offer unless she were really, really desperate which, lucky for Belesis, she was. Read more »
Only stipulation is that you were recently fired by the firm. Read more »
As you may have heard, over the weekend, UBS CEO Oswald Gruebel informed the board that as much fun as this job’s been, he’d like to quit while still ahead. Sergio Ermotti, head of European business, has been named interim CEO and while a candidate for the gig before the whole Kweku Adoboli incident, the bank isn’t set on him running the place for the long term (“He takes clients out, he’s got a nice tan, but he doesn’t have the charisma to run a place like UBS and to cope with the risk,” one analyst said in July). So, a search is underway, both internally and externally, neither scenario thrilling anyone (an outsider CEO would be tough since next year they’ll be getting an outsider CEO in Axel Weber, while an insider would be someone who was there when shit went down), and a total of one name being proposed in the last 3 days. Read more »
Back in May, UBS AG investment-banking chief Carsten Kengeter told employees that he was “done with their complaints about pay,” and that those asking why they haven’t seen a bonus in several years “just don’t get it.” While the tough love approach may have worked for some, others felt it was too much, with one senior banker noting that “You got off the call and thought ‘how can I stay here any longer?’” And yet, despite the fact that there’s been very high turnover at the bank in the last few months, which many believe has to do with the whole lack of pay situation, there are probably people out there who’d love to work at UBS. Young children in Switzerland. Recent business school graduates who’ve dreamed of living in Stamford their whole lives. Twenty year Wall Street vets looking to jump from Goldman. Unfortunately, those dreams have been dashed by Kengeter, who informed the investment bank that no one is getting, indefinitely. Read more »
If You’ve Got A Boiler Room Fantasy, This Money Management Firm’s Got An Opportunity For You
By Bess Levin
While there are many people who work on Wall Street for reasons that have nothing to do with money (trading gives them a thrill, they enjoy analyzing companies, they love the hours, it’s what they believe they were put on this earth to do, etc), there exists at least a handful of individuals who got into this whole thing for one reason and one reason only: the cash. To those people and more, investor Jim Rogers has some advice: become a farmer. Perhaps you’re a first, second or third year investment banking analyst whose timing (re: when you graduated college but also dating back to when you were conceived) could not have been worse, for whom the year 2006 and the associated bonuses are but a dream. Perhaps you’re a seasoned veteran making great money who’s wanted to try something new but couldn’t think of an industry that could beat your current pay. Perhaps you’re employed by a hedge fund whose performance YTD is not inspiring confidence in this year’s bonus. Perhaps you’re a banker who wants to be compensated in cash and not company stock paid out over 14 years. Doesn’t matter if you’ve never done manual labor in your life, if you don’t know the first thing about milking anything, if you’re emotionally scarred from the one time you rode a tractor. If you wanna make some real money, start working your contacts on the farm. Read more »
Please Identify The Dream Gig: Playing Pro Hockey Or Working As A First Year At JPMorgan
By Bess Levin
According to Yale senior Jeff Anderson, you gotta go with the latter. The opportunity to go pro is one thing but work in the same building as Jamie Dimon? Quite another and not something you want to wake up 30 years down the road asking, what if?
Anderson, who hails from British Columbia, led the Bulldogs to their first No. 1 national ranking last December, after joining them in 2007 when they hadn’t made past the ECAC Hockey quarterfinals in nine years. He graduates this spring and while he’s received “a number of professional hockey opportunities for next year,” he’s only received one once in a lifetime offer- to work for JPMorgan’s sales and trading department. Read more »
New York City wants to hire investment banks to improve the way assets are managed — from parking meters to buildings — but the mayor on Friday flatly rejected selling any of these valuable properties…Though investment banks and hedge funds have raised hundreds of millions of dollars to invest in publicly owned infrastructure — from roads to bridges to tunnels — Bloomberg made it clear he would only consider privatizing the way, for example, equipment is installed and maintained. [Reuters via BI]
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SoFi Answers the Call to Refinance Student Loans and Provides Unique Community Benefits
This is a guest post written by SoFi’s CEO, Mike Cagney.
CLICK HERE TO READ THE FULL ARTICLE
Recently, there’s been a lot of talk amongst leaders in Washington about how to improve the painful process of repaying student loans. At SoFi, we feel your pain and work hard to offer more flexible, more affordable options for our borrowers. One idea that’s getting a lot of attention is increasing the options for refinancing debt after graduation. The only lender currently focused on refinancing private and federal student loans is SoFi.
We recognized early on that borrowers who have made timely payments on their loans, graduated from school, and have a job should be able to refinance their student loans at a lower interest rate. This may be why, after resuming lending by invitation, the media became increasingly interested in what we are doing.
In a recent article posted on MainStreet.com SoFi General Counsel Rob Lavet had this to say about SoFi’s ReFi products: Read more »
You know what they say: You can’t choose your family, but you can choose your financial planner. Or something like that. One of the great things of being in charge of your money is choosing who (if anyone) will help you manage it. The choice isn’t always an easy one. How will you know that your planner is reputable and trustworthy?
These five red flags may be good indications of whether the financial planner sitting across from you is someone you should trust with your money. LearnVest Planning also provides an innovative 7-step program for your money where you work one-on-one with a financial planner. To see if this program is right for you, start with a free financial consultation.
1. She Isn’t Certified
“There are a lot of good planners out there who aren’t Certified Financial Panners™,” says Samantha Vient, CFP®, of LearnVest Planning Services. “However, CFPs® are required to adhere to the CFP® Board’s standards of professional conduct.We believe it’s always a good idea to work with someone who has the CFP® designation, which is issued after completing a CFP® Board-approved personal financial planning curriculum, passing a rigorous exam issued by the Certified Financial Planner Board of Standards, meeting experience requirements and passing an ethics and background check.
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