FYIs

  • 08 Dec 2014 at 3:15 PM

Just An FYI For Next Time

  • 02 Dec 2014 at 5:00 PM

Layoffs Watch: Lily-Livered Fund Managers

Too true, Ken. How's the divorce going?An affinity for risk can be a very bad thing. Blow-up-your-hedge-fund-and-become-a-laughingstock kind of bad. Ask Brian Hunter. Also lose your job kind of bad, especially if your affinity for risk produces losses and you work at Brevan Howard. But an aversion to risk? You might as well start boxing up your cubicle right now, according to science. Read more »

  • 20 Nov 2014 at 5:50 PM

Rich People Are People, Too

And that means that they can have IRAs. They can also do more with their IRAs, the kind of things that can turn $5,000 into $196 million in six years, tax free. Read more »

lloydblankfeingarycohngoldmansachsAfter two long years of a highly uncomfortable process called “cross-ruffing,” today is the day a small group of Goldman Sachs employees’ lives will be forever altered. In addition to the physical change that will result from the new partner status– their genitals will now a emit a light similar to that of a glowing orb, visible through dress pants– here’s what else the young princes and princesses of West Street can expect:

  • A call from on high.
  • Sandwiches in a conference room.
  • The ability to get anyone you want on the phone without having to resort to groveling.
  • A new expectation– because of the bags of money– that you’ll be available to the firm, which can track your movements via the GPS installed in your golden scrot, at any time.

Read more »

If the previous odds of a considerable stay in jail didn’t deter you before… Read more »

This goes out to no one in particular; they just want to make certain things clear, in case anyone is getting any ideas about, say, marital assets. Ideas about stuff like that. Read more »

Turney Duff is a former Galleon trader turned memoirist, who wrote about “drug-fueled benders,” feelings of emptiness, and the time he “faked a mugging by rolling on the pavement and into a puddle until he was bleeding and bruised” as an excuse for missing work one day in “The Buy Side.” It seems unlikely that he’ll rejoin the securities industry, but in the event he does, know that he’s watching you. Read more »

Before Cristina Monteiro, a managing director at JPMorgan Chase & Co. (JPM), flies abroad, she first checks to see where her colleagues will be sitting — and then chooses her own seat on the other side of the plane. “I don’t want to sleep with anyone from my office,” said Monteiro, 53, about the prospect of having a male co-worker as a seatmate on an overnight flight. “I’m very upfront about it. It’s awkward.” [Bloomberg]