Maybe you think you’ll be one of the 100,000 financial services employees projected to be laid off this year. Maybe you’re bracing for a bonus that will need to be supplemented with outside revenue streams. Maybe everything’s going great for you career-wise, you’re at the top of your game but you’ve decided a traditional get to work in the morning, leave at night, keep your pants on the whole time type job is no longer for you. Married couple Tyler and Berkley got that. And while they couldn’t have initially predicted that “turning their bedroom into a new kind of home office” would turn out to be the dream gig they never knew they wanted, that’s exactly what happened.
Tyler, 24, and Berkley, 21, who did not want their last name revealed, said they can usually make about $1,000 a week from doing five nights of amateur porn via webcam around midnight…”We did it once together, that first night,” Tyler said. “Within 30 minutes we had made, like, $300. And I was like, I’m done with the normal 40-hour week. I’m done.”
If that sounds like something you’d be interested in, take 5 to attend an information session with T ‘n B, who say that the one downside to the job is that “Having sex off and on for two, three hours gets kind of hard…It’s, like, rough, so it wears on you a lot.” Continue reading »
By 11 a.m. on a recent sweltering Sunday, Harrison Anastasio had already collected the cellphone numbers of five bikini-clad women on the rooftop pool at the James New York Hotel. “Don’t forget to text me,” one of the women whispered to the 17-year-old, flashing him a coy smile…A certified lifeguard, Anastasio, a rising senior at Edward R. Murrow High School, is also the pool’s tanning concierge. As concierge, Anastasio must ensure pool patrons remember to turn over at designated intervals to evenly brown their front and back sides. Guests decide whether they’d like the teen to gently tap them on the shoulder or send a text when it’s time to turn over. And so it is that this Cobble Hill teen has a phone filled with the numbers of the sorts of beautiful women (and men) who frequent rooftop pools. Anastasio maintains that he resists temptation. “I have the willpower not to text these girls after they leave the pool,” he said. [WSJ]
Though his schedule is extremely packed, Nassim Taleb, who knows everything there is to know about risk while Ben Bernanke knows nothing, has agreed to co-author a paper with the IMF’s Monetary and Capital Markets department “for the G-20 to develop ways to apply his method for identifying tail risks, or the chances of low probability, high-impact event.” Topics discussed will presumably include but not be limited to destroying the Nobel prize before it can destroy us.
Back in April, both the New York Times and Charlie Gasparino claimed they’d heard Lloyd Blankfein was tired. So tired, they were told, that a regular nap would not suffice, but rather an entire lifestyle change was necessary, which included quitting his job. Goldman Sachs said the reports were untrue and reassured us at the time that Lloyd would be with us for many years to come. Unfortunately, the stories opened the door for people to start speculating about who might take over for LB when– we don’t even want to say it let alone think it– he decides he’s done running Goldman Sachs. They included current president Gary Cohn, vice-chairmen Michael Evans and Michael Sherwood, the latter of which was recently named Gary Cohn’s successor as chairman of the partnership committee, as well as “more junior candidates” like, David Heller, Harvey Schwartz, and David Solomon. Today Reuters reports that despite being less known than some of the other names, Solomon “might have what it takes to lead Wall Street’s most powerful bank.”
While it remains to be seen whether his slight resemblance** to Lloyd will be a good or a bad thing for his candidacy (will the fact that he kind of looks like LB serve as a constant reminder that he’s not LB and never will be?) insiders are apparently into Solomon’s laid-back attitude and the fact that he’s not a trader. Here’s a little more info on Lloyd Lite. Continue reading »
If you’re looking for a new gig and think it might be the right fit, put in an application today, as Sheila Bair will be stepping down July 8, after her term expires.
Like some of his colleagues on the field, perhaps Favre should consider a gig on Wall Street. Continue reading »
To be sure, there are many interesting positions to be had at SAC that most boys and girls would kill for. There’s Steve’s, which is a pretty good gig. There’s IR, which is fun. There’s president Cohnheeney’s, though few are good looking enough. There’s SC’s bodyguard, which is exciting and involves a gun. And of course there are the trading slots. They all come with great money, fleece apparel and of course prestige.
But unless you also want serious stress and pressure hanging over your head hour to hour day to day month to month, none of them are for you. You want the job where it is possible to utter the words “I’m gonna take off for a few hours, hit the links, maybe grab a sandwich” during the course of a trading session without fear of having a sand wedge shoved up your ass. You want the job that belongs to Sam Evans, SAC Capital golf pro in residence. Continue reading »
In an interview with Deal Journal about his documentary of the former governor, Client 9, filmmaker Alex Gibney mentions that one of the prostitutes featured, who goes by the name “Angelina,” has since left one ho’ing business for another– due to her high-profile clients, she was able to land a gig on Wall Street. Continue reading »
A very wise man once said, “Risk is what you make of it.” Whether it was walking over a chasm without the proper gear, being leveraged 40 to 1 in October 2008 or getting in the car to drive hundreds of miles for a milkshake when you know full well your wife said NO DAIRY, this part-time philosopher has long known there’s potential rewards to taking a big leap. And now he wants to take another one– on you. Continue reading »
Are you a trader looking for a new gig? Do you have certain requirements of the job that’ve made finding the perfect employer slightly difficult? Do they include:
* Wearing flip-flops, polos and shorts to work?
* Taking leisurely lunches
* Enjoying yourself a good rom-com and paying matinee prices?
* Playing 18 holes before the close?
* Catching a few winks on the company roof deck?
* Having bosses that understand there’s not much of a point to working more than a few hours a day?
Then shoot a resume over to Briargate Trading. These are the guys for you. Continue reading »
Earlier this week, Meredith Whitney forecast that Wall Street firms will cut 80,000 jobs in the next 18 months. Naturally we hope the Dollar Dominatrix is off in her prognostication but in the event she’s seeing the ball on this one, it’s important to think about what you might do in the event you are unfortunately axed. An equally desirable gig in the financial services industry might not immediately present itself. In the interim, you may need to do something to tide yourself over. Perhaps involving rubber gloves and that French maid outfit you’ve been dying to put to use. Take a page from this enterprising lady’s playabook. Continue reading »
