The folks over at SumZero have crunched the numbers on their 11,000 members to find out just where you should send your kids if you want them to follow your footsteps into the buy-side at a hedge fund, and you’ll be stunned by the results. Just kidding: Send them to Wharton or Harvard. Or, if possible—or if, say, Wharton or Harvard aren’t, either because you’re kid’s a dolt and/or because you foolishly went to Brown or Binghamton or something, depriving your progeny of that most important gift, legacy status—you could always just ship them off to Colgate which, on account of its size, doesn’t have many alums at the best fund, but which Sabermetrically blows everyone out of the water. The place down the road from Harvard’s not a bad choice, either. Nor is Mike Bloomberg’s alma mater. Read more »
Abigail Thernstrom has been watching Blankfein’s rise to the upper echelons of Wall Street from her office Cambridge, waiting patiently for the day a reporter would finally give her an opening to reveal he owes her 30,000 words on the law. Read more »
Kloss, who posted an Instagram picture of herself studying at Harvard library, took Professor Anita Elberse’s course “The Business of Media, Entertainment and Sports,” which ran last week at Harvard Business School. Victoria’s Secret Angel Kloss recently said, “Tyra [Banks] did it. She [attended classes at] Harvard Business School. I can do it, too.” [NYP]
Harvard Investment Agent Didn’t Want To Overstep His Bounds Re: Asking For A Slightly Flashier Bribe Than US News & World Report’s #19 On 2010 Affordable Midsize Cars ListBy Bess Levin
Though it’s entirely possible that he did attempt to overstep his bounds in a negotiation that went down like this:
“If I’m gonna do this for you I want a Cadillac. With the seat warmers.”
“You’ll get a Chrysler Sebring and you’ll like it.”
“Bull shit! Bull shit!”
“YOU WANT A DODGE STRATUS? ‘CAUSE WE CAN MAKE THAT HAPPEN.”
“No…no I’m sorry. I don’t know what I was thinking.”
“It’s okay, you’re emotional.”
“Do you think I can get it in red?”
“Sure, we’ll see what we can do.” Read more »
Behold The Dazzling Array Of Lies Mathew Martoma (née Thomas) Told Before Getting Expelled From Harvard Law SchoolBy Bess Levin
Yesterday we learned that Mathew Martoma, on trial for orchestrating “the largest insider trading scheme in history,” got himself expelled from Harvard Law School 15 years ago for creating fake transcripts to boost his grades. Obviously, this is not a great thing to have come to light if you are about to ask a jury to believe you are an innocent man, particularly if the judge presiding over your case is going to allow the story to be included by the prosecution.
But apparently changing his Civil Procedure grade from B to A (Contracts from B+ to A; Criminal Law B to A) was but a warm up for the deluge of lies the artist formerly known as Ajai Mathew Thomas would go on to tell! The subsequent ones, courtesy of the findings of Harvard’s administrative board, included:
- Claiming the fake transcript was only meant to be seen by his parents
Mr. Thomas asserts that he did not purposefully send the judges the altered transcript. He contends that they received it by accident. According to Mr. Thomas, he altered his transcript only for the purpose of deceiving his parents.
- Blaming the mix up on his brother
At the end of December of in early January, Mr. Thomas’s application for a clerkship was sent to 23 judges in the United States Court of Appeals. The applications included the altered transcript. . . . Mr. Thomas has stated that it was his intention that the real transcript be sent with his applications. According to his statement, he arranged with his brother for the latter to prepare the packets of materials for mailing to each judge; his brother came across the altered transcript and, mistakenly believing that it was the real transcript, included it with the application.
- Potentially the best lie among the lot, the one in which he said that after he was asked to interview with the judges who received the altered grades, he tried his hardest to come off as a candidate they wouldn’t want to hire…
On January 26 and 27, Mr. Thomas interviewed for a clerkship with Judge Sentelle, Judge Randolph, and Judge Ginsburg of the United States Court of Appeals for the D.C. Circuit. Mr. Thomas did not disclose to the judges that the transcript that they had received was not accurate…Mr. Thomas has stated that it was his intention, in order to avoid any harmful effect from the altered transcript, not to be offered a clerkship and that he tried not to be a successful candidate at the interviews.
- …but damn it, they saw through his act!
Before Mathew Martoma was (allegedly!) telling Steve Cohen to dump large positions in Elan and Wyeth based on inside information he received from a doctor involved in clinical trials of an Alzheimer’s drug, he was making fake transcripts of his grades at Harvard Law School. Read more »
Hardcore Harvard Investment Group Soliciting Student Partners Who Aren’t Afraid To Take Some Risks With Their Parents’ MoneyBy Bess Levin
You’re a Harvard undergrad and you want to beef up your resume so that in a couple years, top hedge funds will be begging you to take meetings with them. You figure joining some sort of on-campus investor group might do the trick, but there are so many to choose from it’s difficult to figure out which one is going to be your ticket to the big leagues. Except it’s not actually that difficult at all. In fact, the answer is quite simple. There are student investment clubs and there is Black Diamond Capital Investors. The former, piddling little after-school programs for, when it comes down to it, amateurs. The latter, an opportunity to put your balls on the table and make some real money. Read more »