hedge fund managers

Polygon Investment Partners’ Reade Griffiths is feeling a little bit cramped in his adjoining townhouses in the Royal Borough of Kensington and Chelsea. An extra 10,000 square feet or so—complete with a pool and spa—should do the trick.

Unfortunately for the claustrophobic Mr. Griffiths, he’s going to have to pay a 20% “house the poors” tax to get permission to actually build the £4 million, two-story lair, which through the magic of real-estate will turn into £10 million in added value. It is unclear what Reade’s £825K will actually be used for, since there are not any poor people in the Royal Borough of Kensington and Chelsea. Read more »

As many of you know, the last number of months have not been the best of times for hedge fund manager Steve Cohen. In addition to taking it up the tailpipe from several federal agencies, some of which he’s written $600+ million checks to, others whose fearless leader eats raw meat for breakfast and hopes to one day feast on Cohen tartare, the SAC Capital founder has seen friendships tested and found where loyalties lie. And it hasn’t been pretty.

Employees, despite being told their jobs are safe, have been holding exploratory interviews with other funds in hotel rooms that rent by the hour. The guy who previously said he’d be there through “the bombs going off” left Cohen in the trenches, alone, taking grenades. Clients have requested their money back on en masse; as of Friday night, virtually all outside investors were expected to have filed redemptions requests if they had not done so already.

Except for one. Read more »


[Via ZH, Related: Dan Loeb’s High Road Is Paved With High Impact Enemas Administered By A 77 Year-Old Man]

As some of you may recall, early last week, hedge fund manager Dan Loeb continued his public call for Sony to dump its entertainment division, writing that it was “perplexing” that CEO Kazuo Hirai had zero sense of shame about releasing “After Earth” and “White House Down,” i.e. “2013′s versions of Waterworld and Ishtar.” The Third Point manager went on to say that that the division is “being ineffectively overseen” and that it should be someone other than Sony’s job to worry about its “troubling results.” Loeb obviously wrote the letter and demanded the changes with the belief that, as one of the company’s largest investors, he had the right to weigh in. One person who felt differently was George Clooney, who late last week took the opportunity to offer that, in his opinion, Dan Loeb doesn’t know dick about the movie industry. Clooney described Loeb as a “carpetbagger,” a fear monger, and an interloper with zero knowledge of what it takes to make good movies, whose influence would only result in the production of “tent poles” and “crap.”

So it was somewhat surprising to hear Loeb, who earlier this week received word that Sony would be declining the advice to spin off the entertainment division, say in an interview that he and GC are basically totally on the same page. Read more »

‘Cause somebody’s recouped record losses in his Recovery fund, meaning somebody can start charging performance fees again! Read more »

A lesser man might be sweating the impending fraud charges against the firm that manages his money, but SAC Capital investor Ed Butowsky’s brows and underarms are bone dry. Butowsky, who has gone on record recently to say that 1) he wishes he could put more money with SAC and 2) anyone speaking ill of Steve Cohen can and should go fuck themselves, is fairly certain Team SAC will come out of this stronger than when they started. And when that day comes he’ll be there with party hats and streamers, driving the giant S-A-C-shaped float he’s been working on in his garage through the streets of downtown Stamford, accompanied by Beamers girls shooting zip-up fleeces out of stadium-style tee-shirt guns. There’ll be Zamboni rides and Facepaint, and a petting zoo for the kids. It’ll be the greatest celebration this town has ever seen and will serve as a monument to one man’s unwavering faith in another. And if that other man wants to throw some gratitude in the unwaveringly faithful guy’s direction, maybe by making him a senior adviser or giving him his own parking spot or just taking the time to say, “Ed, I couldn’t have done it without you. And I think of you like a brother,” that’d be okay too. Read more »

Earlier today, a person, if a person were so inclined, could hop on his or her Bloomberg terminal, start a message to hedge fund manager Dan Loeb, and be greeted with a header that proclaimed “New HLF Product: The Herbalife Enema, Administered by Uncle Carl.” This line was an obvious reference to the figurative enema Pershing Square chief Bill Ackman has undergone at hands of the shake and supplement company and fellow money manger, Carl Icahn. After a flurry of articles pointing out Loeb’s anus-themed diss, the Third Point manager’s header was changed to “Always take the high road.” While one might quick to assume this meant Loeb had had a change of heart re: his previous statement, and had felt it’d been a less than diplomatic thing to say, doing so would make an ass of you and me. Read more »