I would die and go to hell if it’s a Ponzi scheme

  • 10 Jul 2009 at 12:40 PM

Sir Stanford Takes Issue With Conditions Behind Bars

By Bess Levin

Picture 1688.pngA lawyer for Sir Allen Stanford has appealed a judge’s decision to keep his client in the big house pending trial. Why? ‘Cause Stanfords weren’t meant to be cooped up behind bars like criminals! They need the space to stretch their shit out, drop weights for attention, and run free! But not run, like, in the flight risk sense. No, that would never happen, because Big Al’s innocent. Got nothing to run from and suggestions to the contrary will result in a punch to the mouth. Getting real for two, attorney Dick DeGuerin realizes there’s not a chance in hell that Stanford will get to go home ahead of his court date, but if he could be place in a more comfortable prison, where the duo could plan what’s sure to be an air-tight defense (this is a case of regulators just being jealous they weren’t the 405th wealthiest person in the world) without prying eyes looking over their shoulders, that’d be top notch.

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  • 25 Jun 2009 at 12:21 PM

Allen Stanford Pleads Not Guilty

By Bess Levin

Vis-a-vis fraud charges (suggestions so the contrary will result in a punch to the mouth). As for allegations that he’s a maverick rich Texan who puts moose heads on the wall and drops weights at the gym in order to get people’s attention? Guilty as charged.
Earlier: You’re F’ing Right I’m Gonna Fight

  • 30 Apr 2009 at 11:00 PM

Allen Stanford Tries To Prove Innocence By Showing Us He’s Insane

By Bess Levin

R. Allen Stanford gave himself up to prove he hasn’t given up.
Stanford and lawyer Dick DeGuerin marched the few downtown blocks from DeGuerin’s office to the federal courthouse today to “surrender” Stanford to federal authorities even though there was no warrant for his arrest and he hasn’t been charged with any crimes.
“We want to surrender him into custody,” DeGuerin told the woman behind the glass at the U.S. Marshal’s office on the10th floor. Stanford stood nearby, his company insignia eagle pin on his lapel.
[...]
Because there was no warrant for Stanford, the marshal’s office did not take him into custody and didn’t even write down his address as DeGuerin offered.

Stanford ‘surrenders’ to feds who didn’t want him [Houston Chronicle]
Earlier: Sir Stanford: “You’re F’ing Right I’m Gonna Fight”