Q: You couldn’t have not known what was happening. The central figure, the former deputy chief of staff Bridget Kelly, was one of your own most senior aides. A: …The fact that every day, 65,000 people have letterhead with my name on it and I don’t know what they’re doing all day. Now I understand that people say well, this isn’t one of the 65,000 — this is someone in your office. You know, the fact is, as I said at the press conference, Matt, if someone doesn’t tell you the truth, there is often very little you can do in reaction to that. So, no, anyone who would say that has no appreciation for what it’s like to be governor or, frankly, chief executive of any kind of major organization. That’s like saying any of these folks who’ve been in trouble in the banking industry, like the JPMorgan Chase thing – how could Jamie Dimon not have known about a trade that was being put on by a trader in London? Well, you know, I think it’s fairly safe to say that Jamie Dimon didn’t know that a trade was being put on, and that when people lied about it, he didn’t know they were lying. So it happens. [Matt Bai via BI]
Chris Christie: Jamie Dimon Didn’t Know What The Whale Was Up To, Therefore I Had Nothing To Do With BridgegateBy Bess Levin
A feisty Jamie Dimon said that he’s not planning on resigning in the wake of a raft of fines that has plagued JP Morgan over the past year. Asked if he would consider resigning on a conference call this morning to discuss the bank’s fourth-quarter results with reporters, the chairman and CEO fired off: ”No, no and no.” He qualified his comments in the same breath, “And it’s all up to the board.” [Quartz]
Jamie Dimon Sees The Kardashian’s David LaChappelle-Directed Christmas Card And Raises Them “Tennis With Giant Balls In Our Park Avenue Living Room”By Bess Levin
Earlier this month. Jamie Dimon’s office at 270 Park Avenue. Dimon is on his computer scrolling through pictures. As we get closer, we see that he’s looking at old Kardashian family Christmas cards that Kourtney and Khloe have tweeted, before the big reveal of this, which elicits a “Oh for crying out loud” from Dimon. After a few more moments he picks up the phone.
Judy Dimon: Hello?
Jamie Dimon: It’s me.
Judy Dimon: Oh hi honey, I’m glad you called, do you want me to pack your flannel shirt for the weekend? And what time will you be home, because I think we should get on the road by 5 and–
Jamie Dimon: Yeah, listen, you need to call the Blankfeins and cancel.
Judy Dimon: What do you mean cancel? We’ve been trying to do this weekend in Vermont with them for months.
Jamie Dimon: Can’t do it Judy. Cancel with Laura and then call the girls. Tell them to be at the house for a family meeting at 1900 hours.
Judy Dimon: Jamie what is this about?
Jamie Dimon: You know what it’s about.
Judy Dimon: I want to hear you say it.
Jamie Dimon: Don’t make me, Judy.
Judy Dimon: No, if I’m going to be forced to cancel our weekend with the Blankfeins and devote the next two days straight to what you have planned, I want to hear the words come out of your mouth. Read more »
Gary Cohn Chooses Not To Say, “I ran into Jamie Dimon on the first night of Hannukkah and asked him what it was like to have a menorah shoved up his ass” In The Presence Of A ReporterBy Bess Levin
Goldman Sachs emerged from the financial crisis as the whipping boy of Wall Street. But on Monday evening, the firm’s chief executive, Lloyd C. Blankfein, was feted like a king. Or perhaps like a rabbi. “Lloyd, I’d like to welcome you to your second bar mitzvah,” David K. Wassong, the co-head of private equity at Soros Fund Management, said at the annual Wall Street Dinner sponsored by the UJA-Federation of New York, a charitable organization focused on Jewish philanthropy. “The only difference is that tonight the money goes to UJA.” [...] For Mr. Blankfein and Gary D. Cohn, the No. 2 at Goldman, the evening reflected the firm’s prominent position on Wall Street and the public relations recovery it has undertaken since the crisis. One financial analyst, Michael Mayo, approached Mr. Cohn after the event and jokingly suggested that the folks at Goldman should send a Hanukkah present to Jamie Dimon, the chief executive of JPMorgan Chase, a bank that has recently fallen from favor in Washington after a number of run-ins with regulators. Mr. Cohn smiled at the suggestion. “I have a joke about that,” he said. But with a reporter present, he declined to tell it. [Dealbook]
Not Going On TV And Telling Regulators To “Regulate This [gestures at crotch]” Working Out Pretty Well For Mike CorbatBy Bess Levin
Back in the day, as in pre-financial crisis, it was okay– nay, encouraged– for a bank chief executive officer to conduct himself in a brash, swaggering manner that communicated a general message of “I do what I want and if you don’t like it, suck on this.” Regulators were peons to be told where to go, the pages of the Journal were a place to thump their chests. San Pietro was a place for holding court while knocking back 9 martinis. If you didn’t like what they had to say, too damn bad.
Somewhere in the last couple years, though, things started to change. People no longer wanted to hear executives who helped cause the global financial crisis tell the world why they were right and you were wrong. Responding to calls that enormous bonuses struck an out of touch tone by inviting CNBC into their offices, dropping trau, telling the cameraman “you’re gonna wanna zoom in on this,” and rolling around in a pile of money with abandon was no longer as effective as it once was. Regulators no longer took kindly to receiving FedEx packages that included photographs of CEOs using pages of, for example Dodd-Frank, as toilet paper with a gold star atop that read “You tried.”