Jamie Dimon

  • jamie-dimon

    News

    Jamie Dimon Suggests The Government Stop Twiddling Its Thumbs On This Fiscal Cliff Business And Start Moving Its Asses

    “We are one decision away from restoring our fiscal and moral authority from around the […]

    / Dec 12, 2012 at 4:56 PM
  • mariannalake

    News

    New JPMorgan CFO Is A Female Jamie Dimon, Says Person

    J.P. Morgan named finance executive Marianne Lake to succeed Douglas Braunstein as chief financial officer […]

    / Nov 19, 2012 at 5:51 PM
  • Who could demote THAT FACE?

    Banks, News

    JPMorgan CFO Handsome

    JPMorgan did its third-quarter earnings call this morning, and even though the London Whale was […]

    / Oct 12, 2012 at 11:18 AM
  • News

    Jamie Dimon Is Still Waiting For His Thank You For Buying Bear

    JPMorgan Chase Chief Executive Jamie Dimon said his company has lost up to $10 billion […]

    / Oct 10, 2012 at 3:52 PM
  • News

    JPMorgan’s Security Team Almost Didn’t Let This Happen

    Dimon recalls that when he e-mailed his senior executives, back in 2010, first proposing the […]

    / Oct 4, 2012 at 6:09 PM
  • News

    On One of The Worst Days Of WhaleGate For Jamie Dimon, JPMorgan’s Vice-Chairman Thought It Would Make Him Feel Better To Hear From Another Guy Who’s Sort Of But Not Really Been There

    As you may have heard, Summer 2012 was not the best of times for JPMorgan CEO Jamie Dimon. On May 10, after having said that a Bloomberg story about one of its London traders making very large, very worrisome bets was but “a tempest in a teapot,” the bank announced that said trader had lost approximately $2 billion. On May 11, it was suggested that Dimon’s title of most loved-banker on Wall Street was up for grabs. On June 19, Dimon was forced to testify on Capitol Hill. In July 13, JPMorgan was forced to revise the $2 billion loss to $6 billion. Associates who surrounded Dimon during these days said that the stress was visibly wearing on him, and that it was arguably one of the worst periods of his career. And while senior executives logged long hours and gave up weekends and holidays to help deal with the fallout, gathering documents and unwinding trades and trying to manage the crisis, only one busted his ass to actually give Jamie Dimon what he needed: Jimmy Lee.

    After spending much of July 13 again explaining the trading loss to the media and to research analysts—including making the stunning admission that the traders in London may have intentionally mismarked the trades to make them look less egregious, a potential illegality that the Justice Department is still investigating—the exhausted Dimon got an unexpected call from Tom Brady, the star quarterback of the New England Patriots. (Jimmy Lee, a legendary sports fan, had arranged for it.) Brady reminded Dimon that even Super Bowl champs have bad days and told him “to hang in there.”

    And after thinking about it and thinking about it and thinking about it some more, snapped his finger and said, “I’ve got it- we need to get Tom Brady on the line.” And then gathered his five secretaries in his office and told them to clear his and their schedules because they needed to get this deal done by the end of the day. And when he finally got Brady on the line, assured him that the call would be welcome and that it wouldn’t be awkward* or seem out of left field. “Just tell him he’s got this. Tell him that if banking or football were easy everyone would be doing it. Tell him that even on your worst day, you still get to go home and bang that little Brazilian of yours. No, wait, scratch that. Tell him you can’t generate profits and be responsible for the losses at the same time. Tell him, ‘Keep your chin, up, kid.’ Tell him you’re down by 7, you just took a huge sack, Gronkowski’s got a broken leg and you’re not wearing a cup. But there’s still time left on that clock, Jamie D. And as long as there’s time left on that clock, you’re going to score a mother fucking touchdown. Tell him, ‘Go get ’em, Tiger.’ You still there, pal?”

    Jamie Dimon On The Line [VF]

    / Oct 4, 2012 at 2:10 PM
  • Newsflash People

    Jamie Dimon Shook Up JPMorgan Management Post-CIO Loss Because He God Damn Well Felt Like It, Will Support The Asinine Reforms Threatening To Destroy America On A Dark Day In Hell

    Jamie Dimon, the outspoken chief executive of JPMorgan Chase, sat down on Tuesday for what […]

    / Sep 12, 2012 at 11:50 AM
  • News

    Bloomberg: Not One Bank CEO Can Fill Jamie Dimon’s Shoes, Especially Not That Guy From Australia Who Doesn’t Own An Iron

    “Swung by @JPmorganchase and got to see where all the action takes place.“ [Meghan Musnicki]

    / Aug 16, 2012 at 1:24 PM
  • News

    If You Work At JPMorgan And Are Thinking About Losing A Few Billion, Take Note

    “And I want you to know the London Whale issue is dead,” Jamie Dimon recently […]

    / Aug 13, 2012 at 3:39 PM
  • News

    JPMorgan Still Reaping What Whale Boy Hath Sown

    JPMorgan can’t outrun the ripples from its multibillion-dollar “London Whale” trading blunder. The largest U.S. […]

    / Aug 9, 2012 at 6:25 PM
  • News

    4 Percent Of Americans Think Jamie Dimon Is Prepping His Bike To Jump The 526 Feet Between The Top Of JPMorgan Headquarters And The Roof Of The Old Bear Stearns Building

    In spite of JPMorgan Chase’s well-publicized loss of more than $5 billion, just 14 percent […]

    / Jul 30, 2012 at 10:47 AM
  • News

    Whaledemort’s Soul, Portfolio Broken Up And Hidden In JPMorgan Investment Bank

    Who wins the call-the-Whale-close? The headline number is a $4.4 billion loss this quarter but […]

    / Jul 13, 2012 at 8:38 AM
  • News

    A Company Is In The Hole For $182 Billion, Hank Greenberg Can See The Merit In A Congressional Hearing But $2-9BN? Beat It

    “Many companies have transactions that go bad,” Greenberg said today on “In the Loop With […]

    / Jul 9, 2012 at 6:39 PM
  • News

    If One More Person Gives Jamie Dimon Shit About The London Whale Leon Cooperman Is Just Gonna Snap

    JPMorgan disclosed on May 10 that it had a $2 billion trading loss because of […]

    / Jun 28, 2012 at 4:59 PM
  • News

    JPMorgan Expanding Risk Team After You Know Who Ruined Things For The Whole Class

    J.P. Morgan has added at least five new employees over the past month to the […]

    / Jun 28, 2012 at 1:09 PM
  • Come at me, Maxine.

    News

    Jamie Dimon Chats About Managing Duration Risk With Friendly Congressman

    The House’s ping-ponging alternation of smacking and caressing Jamie Dimon today got pretty boring but […]

    / Jun 19, 2012 at 3:22 PM
  • JPMorgan Flogging

    Representative Carolyn Maloney: Why Didn’t You Lose Billions Of Dollars In New York? What’s London Got That We Don’t?

    “Mr. Dimon, I thought you loved New York. Why did all this activity take place […]

    / Jun 19, 2012 at 12:18 PM
  • JPMorgan Flogging

    So What You’re Saying Is…It’s Possible

    Congressman: “Mr. Dimon, is it possible that JPMorgan could lose $2 trillion?”

    / Jun 19, 2012 at 12:15 PM
  • News

    Meredith Whitney Not Worried About Jamie Dimon’s Ability To Handle House Financial Services Committee, Unlike Some Chief Executives She Knows

    So, 1. How dare you, lady? Lloyd’s impish smile and comedic timing don’t do it for you? And 2. We thought these kind of blows were reserved for Vikram.

    Banking Industry Must Reinvent Itself, Says Whitney [Bloomberg TV]
    Related: Meredith Whitney Cannot Stress Enough How Little She Thinks Of Citigroup

    If we’re being totally honest, while it had its moments, last week’s Jamie Dimon Congressional hearing to discuss Whale Boy was a bit of a letdown, theatrically-speaking. This was probably due in large part to the fact that it was conducted by the Senate Banking Committee, and the Senate typically comes off intelligent and reasonable compared to the House,* and proceeded accordingly. As we surely don’t have to tell you, this is not the kind of hearing we are interested in.

    We are interested in hearings that involve Congressmen and women screaming “I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU HAVEN’T BEEN PROSECUTED YET!!!” at financial services employees and accusing them of dressing up as Girl Scouts in order to deceive the public. We are interested in hearings that involve the use of the term “smart-alecks.” We are interested in hearings that involve subjects being told to be more like Magic Johnson. We are interested in hearings that involve subjects who’ve never worked for Goldman Sachs being grilled until they break about working at Goldman Sachs. We are interested in hearings that involve bath salts, or the suggestion that the people conducting it have taken a bunch of them and at any moment might leap across the dais to eat the witness’s face off. Fortunately, we might get the chance for all that and more tomorrow, when Dimon makes another trip down to D.C. to appear before the House Financial Services Committee to talk whales.

    In House Testimony, Dimon Sticks To Script [Dealbook]

    *Make no mistake, most of them fell short of becoming Rhodes Scholar Quarterfinalists, but we’re speaking in relative terms here.

    / Jun 18, 2012 at 5:07 PM
  • News

    So This Is Jim Cramer Talking About Jamie Dimon’s Capitol Hill Appearance

    “He didn’t win. He’s a loser. How? You lose when you go in front of Congress and you lose when you go out. Anyone that declares him a winner is wrong…He walked in a loser. Testified. Walked out a loser. And by the way, he agrees with me. He knows he’s a loser with no control and doesn’t even know what happened in his own bank…A loser. Crisis PR is psychiatry. You go in there as a guy who is stupid, you don’t come out being smarter. You don’t. You come out just as stupid…He’s a loser…This is not Michael Corleone with Frank Pentangeli in the back of the room. This is not Nevada gaming licenses…He’s a loser. It’s okay, man. He’s a loser. Maybe next year he’ll be a winner but he is a loser. Okay.”

    / Jun 13, 2012 at 5:39 PM
  • JPMorgan Flogging

    Jamie Dimon: “We Are All Blessed To Have The American Financial System”

    “It is be the best in the world.” We should give thanks and “stop shooting […]

    / Jun 13, 2012 at 11:15 AM
  • JPMorgan Flogging

    Is It Polish Craps? Is It Ukrainian Blackjack?

    Senator Bob Menendez: I listen to this [hearing] and I paraphrase Shakespeare when I ask, […]

    / Jun 13, 2012 at 11:12 AM
  • JPMorgan Flogging

    Jamie Dimon: Don’t Blame The Risk Committee!

    They took JPMorgan through the financial crisis “with flying colors.” The Whale stuff was a […]

    / Jun 13, 2012 at 10:44 AM
  • News

    Jamie Dimon: It Most Likely Won’t Happen Again

    “When we make mistakes, we take them seriously and often are our own toughest critic,” […]

    / Jun 12, 2012 at 5:14 PM
  • News

    Columbia University Students, Faculty, Alums Demand CU President Take Back All The Nice Things He Said About Jamie Dimon

    As you may have noticed, Jamie Dimon has had some unwanted attention thrown his way over the last several weeks, on account of one of his employees losing a few billion dollars. Though the JPMorgan CEO has been dealing with public displays of hate previously reserved for Lloyd Blankfein and Goldman Sachs, and will certainly be on the receiving end of a lot more tomorrow when he testifies on Capitol Hill, he has had a few people come to his (and his bank’s) defense. Yesterday Stephen Schwarzman told Bloomberg to lay off JD and JPM, noting that “occasional losses are inevitable” and “publicly excoriating JPMorgan serves no purpose except to reduce people’s confidence in the financial system,” while former Goldman exec Bill Archer said the whale fail makes him just “kind of shrug.” Lee Bollinger, who is President of Columbia and chairman of the Federal Bank of New York’s board of directors told the Journal that Dimon shouldn’t step down from his post as a director, as some have requested, and that those who cite conflicts of interest have a “false understanding of how [the Fed] works.” Some individuals from the Columbia community read Bollinger’s comment and, spoiler alert, are not happy. Enter, a strongly worded letter.

    Mr. Lee Bollinger
    President of Columbia University
    Office of the President
    202 Low Library
    535 West 116th Street, Mail Code 4309
    New York, NY 10027
    Dear President Bollinger,
    As faculty, alumni and students of Columbia University, we are writing to express our deep disappointment in your recent decision to support JPMorgan Chairman and CEO Jamie Dimon’s continued membership on the Board of the New York Federal Reserve Bank.

    As the Chairman of the Board of the New York Fed, your unambiguous duty – as stated by the Guide to Conduct – is to maintain “the integrity, dignity, and reputation of the Federal Reserve System . . . and to avoid actions that might impair the effectiveness of System operations or in any way tend to discredit the System.”

    By supporting Mr. Dimon’s tenure you abdicated this basic responsibility. By echoing Mr. Ben Bernanke’s remarks that it is up to Congress to address this problem, you denied your duty to ensure the integrity of the Fed. By stating that Congress has more pressing issues to address than this one, you, in essence, urged inaction by all parties capable of affecting this important change. Surely you understand that a functioning financial system is a pre-requisite of our country’s economic recovery. By characterizing those who wish to see Mr. Dimon resign as “foolish” and in possession of a “false understanding” of how the Fed works, you have added insult – and inaccuracy – to the injury of encouraging this institution to continue in its current form.

    It is worth reminding you that JPMorgan Chase is currently under investigation for its recent $3 billion trading loss – a loss Mr. Dimon initially denied and then characterized as a ‘tempest in a teapot.’ It may also bear repeating that Mr. Dimon has long campaigned aggressively against important regulatory reforms designed to prevent excessive risk taking by Too Big To Fail institutions – institutions the Federal Reserve saved with $3 trillion dollars in special lending facilities and which Congress bailed out with $700 billion of taxpayers’ money. Certainly Mr. Dimon has no place as a leader of this institution.

    We urge you to reverse your support for Mr. Dimon and call for his immediate resignation. By way of reminder, there is precedent for this kind of action. In April 2011, Jeffrey R. Immelt, CEO of General Electric, stepped down from the NY Fed after it was clear that GE Capital would be regulated by the Fed as a ‘systematically important’ financial institution. As one of the largest banks in the world, JP Morgan is similarly – if not more ‘systemically important.’

    As an educator, you have a special responsibility to demonstrate moral and intellectual credibility, something you have failed to do in this situation. As the president of a university, you have a responsibility to ensure that students have the best possible opportunities upon graduation. Surely you understand the connection between the unemployment crisis facing young people in America and the 2008 financial collapse. That collapse not only threatened the employment potential of millions of American students, but also risked the fiscal health of the parents and grandparents who co-signed their educational loans. That you would choose to uphold the interests of major financial institutions over students and their families is unimaginable. We certainly hope that the contributions made to Columbia by JPMorgan – sums north of $500,000 – had nothing to do with your decision.

    Three years after the biggest financial crisis since the Great Depression, the country is struggling to rebuild its economy. A stable and appropriately governed financial system is a critical pre-requisite of our recovery. As the Chairman of the NY Fed, we urge you to take the obvious step of demanding Mr. Dimon’s resignation.

    Thank you,
    Current Students, Alumni and Faculty of Columbia University
    Richard Adams
    Graduate Student and Alumnus

    Marcellus Andrews
    Professor of Economics
    Columbia University

    John Atlas
    President of the National Housing Institute Charles H. Revson Fellow, 2004

    Partha Banerjee
    J-School, 2000

    Hilary Beattie
    Asst. Clinical Professor of Medical Psychology in Psychiatry

    Carl Bettendorf
    Alumnus and Adjunct Faculty

    Lila Braine

    Dana Burnell
    Alumni

    Sylvia Bettendorf
    Student

    Jamie Chen
    CC Class of ’09

    Paul Colson
    Faculty

    Jonathan Crissman
    Student

    Mina Dadgar
    Alumni

    Carolyn Douglas
    Associate Professor of Psychiatry

    Nnaemeka Ekwelum
    Class of 2012

    Tim Foreman
    Student

    David Friedman
    Officer

    Danielle G.
    Student

    Nancy Goody
    Alumnae -GS of Arch & HP

    Warren Green
    Administrator

    Robert Hanning

    William D. Hartung
    Center for International Policy
    Columbia College Class of 1978

    James Hone
    Faculty

    Bonnie Kaufman
    Faculty, Medical School

    Jee Kim
    Columbia College, ‘95

    Susan Lob
    Adjunct Faculty and Alumni

    Barbara Lundblad
    Faculty
    Union Theological Seminary

    John Markowitz
    Professor of Clinical Psychiatry,
    Alumnus College ’76, GSAS ’78, P&S ’82

    Rangi McNeil
    School of the Arts Alumni

    Sara Minard
    Faculty

    Federick Neuhouser
    Professor of Philosophy

    Michael Newell

    Kaveh Niazi
    Alumni

    Jeffrey Ordower
    Columbia College Class of 1991

    Alexandra Pines
    Class of 2016

    Ai-jen Poo
    Director
    National Domestic Workers Alliance

    Bill Ragen
    Columbia College 1980

    Yuliya Rimsky
    Columbia University
    Alumnus Class of 2012 & SIPA student Class of 2014

    Katherine Roberts
    Alumna, GSAS

    Eva Salzman
    Alumni

    Jeff Schneider
    Alumni

    Shruti Sehgal
    BC Alumnus, Class of 2011

    Eric J. Schoenberg
    Adjunct Associate Professor
    Columbia Business School

    The Honorable David Segal
    Former RI state representative
    CC ‘01

    Anat Shenker-Osorio
    Founder and Principal, ASO Communications, Columbia College ’99

    Kobi Skolnick
    Current student of Negotiation and Conflict Resolution, Class of 2013

    Jill Strauss

    Denise J. Tartaglia
    Alumni

    Stephanie Taylor
    Co-Founder, Progressive Change Campaign Committee, Columbia University alumni, SOA ’07

    Alan Wallach
    Alumnus

    Mark Watson
    Alumnus

    James Williams
    Officer Libraries

    Thomas J. Yager
    Associate Research Scientist, Mailman School of Public Health

    / Jun 12, 2012 at 5:02 PM
  • News

    Paying Bankers In Derivatives Worked Out So Well For Credit Suisse, Let’s All Do It

    BreakingViews has a couple of posts up about one of my favorite things in the […]

    / Jun 12, 2012 at 3:53 PM