Jimmy Cayne

greenberg.jpg

Amid the turmoil, Alan “Ace” Greenberg, Bear Stearns’s 80-year-old former boss, attempted to break the tension in a lighter way. Wearing his trademark bow tie, Mr. Greenberg, who still trades, performed magic tricks to amuse colleagues.

What the Journal doesn’t tell us, is that Old Man Greenberg did this every day just prior to the close for the last thirty years, at which time, traders would give him spare change “just to go away,” which, little known fact, was part of his plan in the first place. Also, for years, colleagues would hire him as a clown for their children’s birthday parties out of pity. In the beginning Jimmy Cayne would come along as an assistant, but he scared the kids and was dropped from the act pretty early on, without flourish.

Fear, Rumors Touched Off Fatal Run on Bear Stearns
[WSJ]

I’m not exactly sure what we’re supposed to do with this but a (soon to be?) former Bear employee just bcc’d us on this message to a higher up at the bank so we’ll put it out there. That’s what we do at DealBreaker, give voices to those who cannot be heard. We’re practically a human rights watch group, wouldn’t you say? I just wish we’d been non-blind carbon copied, in which case it would be appropriate to re all with “Yeah!” or “We concur!” or something to that effect. If anyone else has a message they’d like to more widely disseminate, send it our way.

It saddens me that you have so simply, arrogantly and cruelly changed the severance classification of the equity research department personnel on the very day no-less that layoffs commenced. This change is reprehensible and you-can-bet grounds for litigation. Many of us in the research department were persuaded to stay and await final determination of our employment status because of the way the severance packages were structured; mind-you, a very deliberate structuring on JPMorgan/Bear’s part for the very reason to dupe us into staying at Bear. Shame on you! You lied! And, of course, the loyal employees your glib lies hurt the most are those who earned the least, the Associates.

greenberg.jpgWe thought it was impossible at this point to dig up any more evidence to support the claim that Jimmy Cayne is a dick who cared more about his recreational activities (card playing, drug use, journalism) than the company he was supposed to be running, but, damn it, it’s been done. And in the same NYT article, another notion we once held regarding Wall Street—that it’s the type of place that kicks you out on your ass long before the dementia sets in—is also blown out of the water.
It’s not surprising in the least that J-Cay would be the type of person to refuse to refer to an elder by the nickname he so obviously loved. Still, the extent to which JC went to deny Alan “Ace” Greenberg one of the last remaining pleasures in the twilight of his life is stunning. According to Landon Thomas, Cayne “makes a point” to “never” use the handle, and has “a standing order among some of his closer associates that anyone who uses the name Ace in his presence, owes him $100.” Due to the fact that virtually no one else at the firm shared Cayne’s inability to utter the one syllable proper noun, this is actually considered to be one of the J man’s most prudent business decisions.
Also in line with what we know but still beating his own record at prickish behavior is the story about how Cayne “convinced” Greenberg to stay at Bear last year, after he threatened to leave, citing a lack of respect, mostly from the big guy himself. The board, trying to stave off a PR crisis, told JC to get in there and make nice. Obviously any ounce of sincerity was out of the question, but they were probably under the impression Cayne could at least fake some stuff about Greenberg being “so important to the firm,” “a valuable part of the team,” “a living antique we don’t want to lose,” and so on and so forth. As it turns out, not so much!
Apparently all Cayne was capable of was citing some speech he’d given at a dinner that mentioned Greenberg’s previous work, before getting pissed off that a man of his stature had even been asked to do something so demeaning, and shouting “Alan, this is the opposite of disrespect, so don’t tell me you are disrespected” and walking out of the room. In Cayne’s defense, he did have the respect not to put Greenberg in a choke hold and ask, “Why don’t you just die, old man?” which you know he wanted to, but still. Way to make the guy feel wanted. (Another thing to note, for fairness sake, is that the reason Cayne had to cut things short was because he was late to play golf, and not because he didn’t “give a baker’s fuck if He Whose Nickname I Shall Not Say stuck around or not.”)
Shockingly left out of the article is the rumor we’ve heard that when Cayne found out those early negotiations between JPMorgan and the Fed had resulted in the Fed, feeling the equity investors didn’t deserve jack, coming up with the $2/share deal, JC was so insulted that he said he’d rather see Bear go to zero than take two, and threatened to take adequate steps to ensure that end. (Cayne scrapped the idea when the Fed supposedly told him they spend the next twenty years investigating every move he ever made at the firm which, I think we can all agree, would’ve been awesome, and would clearly include proof that JC gave away 1,000 shares of BSC to make the pictures of him taping the two-dolllar bill to the door of 383 Madison go away.)
Oh, and “Ace” says that one of the reasons he wanted to leave, in addition to being disrespected, was a bout of depression stemming from his puppy not placing well in dog shows. Enjoy it while you can, Jamie Dimon.
Behind Bear Stearns’ demise, a royal battle at the top [IHT]

  • 01 May 2008 at 11:19 AM

Ya Think?

Forbes notes today that while Goldman Sachs CEO Lloyd Blankfein may have been paid an “obscene” $314,894 a (working) day in 2007, he actually took home less of the bank’s overall profits than most of his counterparts on the Street, who, how to put this, made their firm’s jack, and still proceeded to reward themselves handsomely for a job not so well done. Whereas LB’s compensation, which was about $74 million last year, represented 0.64% of Goldman’s FY07 profits of $11.6 billion, a big time fuck up like, for instance, James Cayne, got paid out 4.73% of Bear’s $233 million profit. Making the idea that GS shareholders should have a “say” on the little guy’s “pay” all the more ridiculous.
A $74 Million Bargain [Forbes]

Here’s a lil’ pick me up for all you bankers thinking you’re the only ones taking it up the tailpipe– JWM Partners, the fund started by John Meriwether after things started to go downhill at LTCM, which recently lost 24 percent in its $1 billion fixed-income hedge fund this year through March 14, just laid off ten employees and two partners have “quit.” DealBreaker has obtained a portion of the heartfelt note Meriwether sent to the unlucky staffers, which you’ll find after the jump.

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Don’t let the fact that they’re firing upwards of 9,000 employees fool you—JPMorgan is trying desperately to recreate that Bear Stearns magic over on Park. The Post reports that Jamie Dimon is rallying hard to retain the services of many of the senior executives who led the bank to its brilliant demise, at all costs. Obviously no dream team would be complete without the big guy himself, but barring the cancellation of a year-long bridge tour which is scheduled to finish at the Vatican, he’s unavailable. Dimon is willing to settle for the next best thing, however, if only he’ll have him: “Jimmy Cayne protégé,” Donald Tang. The former Bear vice chairman considered is “one of the top Asian investment bankers in the US and a bridge to the coveted Chinese market,” character flaws Dimon is willing to overlook in his desire to rebrand JPMorgan as the premier destination for anyone interested in learning to count cards.
Dimon Juiced By Bear Tang [NYP]

Did Bear trick a bunch of Chinese guys into thinking shares of BSC were worth something? I don’t know, I’m not a doctor. But it wouldn’t be the first time (talkin’ about Citic here). H. Roger Wang, a billionaire who operates high-end retail stores in China, claims that he and his wife were “duped” into buying 150,000 shares of the company right before it collapsed, and that on March 18, Bear illegally liquidated the account holding the stock when the Wangs wouldn’t send in unpaid balances on their orders. A lawsuit filed in L.A. yesterday says the couple paid $6.56 million with prices ranging from $33.44 and $71.96 a share. The liquidation value of the stock was said to be $947,324, which has got to hurt. The Wangs allege that their broker told them on March 11 that Bear was “financially sound, that its stock value should be at least $85 per share, and that now was a great time to invest in the stock.” You know, basically what Alan Schwartz said on CNBC a couple days later. Anyway, the take away here is that we should all agree anyone who’s ever come in contact with Bear got fucked, it’s just a question of how hard.
Beverly Hills billionaire alleges Bear Stearns duped him [LA Times]