JP Morgan Chase

  • News

    This Is Why You Pay Your Lawyers And Don’t Ask Questions (JP Morgan Edition)

    Ed. note: This is a weekly column by Elie Mystal, Managing Editor of Above the Law Redline, wrapping up the week that was in law and finance. Elie is not a practicing attorney, and anything he says that you listen to can and will be used against you. So we’re all having fun today with […]

    / Jan 23, 2015 at 4:46 PM
  • News

    Goldman Sachs Recommends JP Morgan Find A Good Chop Shop

    JPMorgan Chase & Co.’s parts are probably worth more to investors than the whole after regulators proposed tougher rules penalizing firms for size and complexity, according to Goldman Sachs Group Inc. JPMorgan could unlock value by splitting its four main businesses or dividing into consumer and institutional companies, Goldman Sachs analysts led by Richard Ramsden […]

    / Jan 5, 2015 at 5:12 PM
  • News

    Treasury Investigating BofA, JPMorgan’s Monopoly On Inmate Bank Accounts, Post-Prison Debt Cards

    Government auditors are investigating exclusive contracts held by Bank of America Corp. and JPMorgan Chase & Co. to provide financial services inside federal prisons…Bank of America has been paid at least $76.3 million by Treasury to manage inmates’ accounts, money transfers, email service and other technology inside the 121 facilities managed by the Federal Bureau […]

    / Oct 16, 2014 at 5:54 PM
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    Area Human Couldn’t Contain Himself Re: JP Morgan’s Earnings

    JP Morgan Chase’s third-quarter results were published more than three hours ahead of schedule because of a mistake by, the investor-communications company owned by Nasdaq OMX Group Inc. “The root cause was a human error internally at,” Ryan Wells, a Nasdaq spokesman, said in an e-mailed statement. provides companies with Internet services […]

    / Oct 14, 2014 at 2:28 PM
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    Pay Hike Watch ’14: Raises For Everyone (Under 25)!

    Well, raises for everyone at Goldman Sachs, Morgan Stanley, and Bank of America. JP Morgan and Citi are still pondering this one.

    / Aug 21, 2014 at 11:49 AM
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    Summer Associate Offer Watch ’14: JP Morgan, BofA, Goldman Sachs, Citi

    Banks are said to have made their best offers this week.

    / Aug 15, 2014 at 4:33 PM
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    Layoffs Watch ’14: JP Morgan

    According to CFO Marianne Lake, the bank may be forced to sacrifice some employees (and bonuses) for the greater good.

    / Jun 11, 2014 at 3:03 PM
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    JP Morgan Learns From Its Mistakes

    Back in November, JP Morgan announced that it would be offering up Vice Chairman Jimmy “Get Tom Brady On The Phone” Lee for questioning by the people of Twitter. The pre-show did not go well and the whole thing had to be canceled, in part because it somehow wasn’t anticipated that there might be lingering […]

    / Feb 13, 2014 at 3:22 PM
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    Bonus Watch ’14: JP Morgan

    If you liked last year’s bonus, you’re gonna love the one coming your way this week.

    / Jan 22, 2014 at 7:13 PM
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    JP Morgan Takes First Steps Toward The 3-Day Work Week

    JPMorgan Chase & Co. plans to boost the number of junior investment bankers it employs by about 10 percent and provide them with “protected weekends” to reduce their workload, a person familiar with the matter said. Jeff Urwin, the New York-based company’s global head of investment banking, announced the changes on an internal conference call […]

    / Dec 18, 2013 at 3:11 PM
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    JP Morgan Multi-Dealer Chatroom Ban Not Just About FX Manipulation (Innocent Dick Jokes Probably A Problem Too)

    JP Morgan Chase and Deutsche Bank are extending bans on the use of multi-dealer online chatrooms, sources familiar with the plans told Reuters, as banks crack down on potentially inappropriate communications following a string of scandals. Chatrooms have been a focus for regulators investigating manipulation of benchmark interest rates and possible rigging in the $5.3 […]

    / Dec 17, 2013 at 2:31 PM
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    Christmas Come Early For JP Morgan Junior Employees

    Back in the day, as in pre-2008, attempts to make the job of a Wall Street junior banker slightly more palatable would have been laughed off as crazy and unnecessary. The main reason was that any complaints to management about treating young employees like indentured servants could be met with: “Yeah…but you’re/they’re making a ridiculous […]

    / Dec 16, 2013 at 3:08 PM
  • News

    Hiring Watch ’13: Ray Kelly

    The Police Commissioner might get a job at JP Morgan.

    / Nov 6, 2013 at 6:14 PM
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    JP Morgan Makes Helpful List Of Legal Woes, For Those Having Trouble Keeping Track

    In its latest corporate confession, the nation’s biggest bank disclosed that it’s facing more than a dozen civil and criminal investigations into its virtually every aspect of its business. Beyond the infamous “London Whale” debacle, the bank is also being investigated over mortgage-bond sales, improper foreclosure practices, interest-rate rigging and power market manipulation, according to […]

    / Nov 1, 2013 at 5:34 PM
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    JP Morgan Chase Rug Thief Explains His Process

    Last May marked a simpler time for JP Morgan. Although revelations about the London Whale had already come to light, the bank was still in a period of relative calm, before one needed a spreadsheet to keep track of the various government investigations into its practices and potential multi-billion fines it would have to pay. […]

    / Oct 29, 2013 at 5:19 PM
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    Preet Bharara May Throw JP Morgan A Bone

    In this case the bone would be a “deferred prosecution agreement” wherein the bank would get a brief reprieve from dealing with one of the 979 investigations it is currently facing.

    / Oct 24, 2013 at 5:06 PM
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    JP Morgan’s Getting Pretty Good At Negotiating These Multi-Billion Dollar Settlement Things

    The bank will pay $4 billion over mortgages but not a penny more! The ghost of John Pierpont Morgan hath put his foot down!

    / Oct 18, 2013 at 5:02 PM
  • jamiedimon

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    Jamie Dimon Tells Employees To Gird Their Loins

    As you may have heard, the last number of months have not been so great for JP Morgan, legally-speaking. In addition to the London Whale fiasco, which the bank is still literally and figuratively paying for, there have been allegations of, well, take your pick: energy market manipulation, bribes for hires, playing it fast and […]

    / Sep 17, 2013 at 5:44 PM
  • News

    Even Sewage Will Get You In Trouble These Days

    Back when rates looked cheap, it became habit to sell financing and swaps and the like to municipalities (perhaps not the brightest municipalities) for infrastructure projects. Now that the terms of the related debt are blowing up badly, states like Alabama want their money bank, and JP Morgan on a platter. The potential sanctions by […]

    / May 8, 2009 at 10:25 AM
  • News

    What Does Jamie Know That You Don’t?

    That as it travels through the galaxy it manages to suck towards its center, all the nearby available mass until, growing and growing, it finally manages attractions of such force that not even bid-ask spreads can escape it. It is… too big to fail and you will see more of it, once a few of […]

    / May 4, 2009 at 3:50 PM
  • News

    Letter To Shareholders: Last Edits

    To LB from JD: Here’s my notes from our late night edit session. I’ve got to send this to the printer posthaste. Let me know what you think or if I missed anything. Let’s face it. 2008 blew. In the annals of annual reports, 2008 has the feel of anal warts. (See what I did […]

    / Apr 16, 2009 at 10:33 AM
  • News

    Personally, We Are Outraged That Recipients Of Public Money Would Be Unwittingly Supplying Nuclear Material To Iran, Aren’t You?

    By using aliases, LIMMT fooled U.S. banks into processing dozens of illegal transactions, Morgenthau said. “Our banks have high standards and sophisticated systems to stop these transactions, but this conduct was specifically designed to defeat their systems,” he said. Some of the U.S. banks involved were Bank of New York Mellon Corp., Bank of America […]

    / Apr 7, 2009 at 2:12 PM
  • News

    Presented Without Comment: J to the D-I-M-O-N


    / Jan 29, 2009 at 4:29 PM
  • News

    Why Open?

    According to our vibrant tip-line: [JP Morgan] open-sourced the CDS analytics engine because no one remembers which precise version of the “binaries” (compield source) code was originally handed over to Bloomberg to fuel the CDSW page. Seriously. Earlier: Open Source CDS Analytics?

    / Jan 29, 2009 at 2:10 PM
  • News

    Open Source CDS Analytics?

    The big JD leaves town for a few days to pontificate and ski and the office just melts down and starts giving away critical intellectual capital. Boy is he going to be mad when he gets back. In this particular case, to the gleeful joy of finance geeks everywhere, JP Morgan has assigned ownership of […]

    / Jan 29, 2009 at 10:39 AM
  • News

    Stop Me If You’ve Heard This One Before

    JP Morgan has “plenty of capital,” thank you very much. And if you people don’t stop talking about this nationalization thing, you are going to fuck the whole thing up for us. Someone should just rewrite Basel II, make a nice speech about it and get the hell out of our way. I mean seriously. […]

    / Jan 29, 2009 at 10:12 AM
  • News

    We Don’t Know, Is It?

    From an inquisitive reader: “Is it really true that at the JPM Life Sciences conf in San Fran they gave out a mug with instructions that feel free to use the water cooler but no drinks or snacks or cocktail parties will be provided.” You tell us.

    / Jan 12, 2009 at 3:21 PM

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