just a suggestion

I own eighty-one leather jackets, seventy-five pairs of boots, forty-one pairs of leather pants, thirty-two pairs of haute couture jeans, ten evening jackets, and 115 pairs of leather gloves. Those who conclude from this that I have a leather fetish, an extreme leather fetish, get a grand prize of zero. And those who are familiar with my choices will sign affidavits attesting to the fact that I wear leather every day. The self-expression feels glorious, an indispensable part of me. As a stranger said after admiring my look in a Gucci burgundy jacquard velvet jacket and a Burberry black patent leather trench, “You don’t give a fuck.” The most expensive leather jacket I own, a Gucci ostrich skin, cost $13,900. The most expensive evening jacket I own, also from Gucci, black napa leather with gold threading, cost $9,800. The most expensive leather pants, $5,600. The most expensive jeans, $2,500. The most expensive pair of boots, $2,600. The most expensive pair of gloves, $1,015. Gucci by far makes up the highest percentage of my collection. The Gucci brand has always held special power for me, ever since the 1960s, when the Gucci loafer with the horsebit hardware was the rage, and my father, who fancied himself as being anti-status when he secretly loved it, broke down and bought a pair. Followed by my mother’s purchase of the famous Jackie O. shoulder bag. As a 13-year-old, I circled the old store on Fifth Avenue several times before getting up the courage to go in and buy a Gucci wallet covered with the insignia. [GQ]

Are you a down on your luck hedge fund manager who hasn’t had a good and/or original idea in a while? Did you get your face ripped off the last two years by going the wrong way on everything? Do you sense that your investors are only sticking around to be nice and/or because you won’t let them leave but will desert you the second you give them an option better than illiquid shares of a walkie-talkie passion project, unless you come up with something and fast? Then you might want to consider sticking their money in this: Read more »

Something you may have picked up on is that lately? Customers are not so happy with their banks, particularly if their banks are Bank of America or Citigroup. The websites apparently never work, there are the rage-inducing fees, and there’s the general feeling that Brian Moynihan and Vikram Pandit? Don’t actually care about them. When was the last time Brian or Vik called, huh? When was the last time they did something nice, for no reason other than wanting to? When was the last time they thought to say “You look really pretty tonight”? Can’t remember, stopped counting and not since the checking account was opened. And while it would be one thing if every other bank treated its customers like they were expendable, some don’t. Take Société Générale Group-owned-Komerční Banka. Not only do they act like they really care but give people a reason to be loud, proud customers. Read more »

  • 19 Jan 2011 at 10:40 AM

Danielle Chiesi To Plead Guilty This Afternoon

Reuters reports that Raj Rajaratnam’s gal-pal will plead guilty to her part in the Galleon insider trading case this afternoon, though it’s unclear exactly what counts she’ll be copping to, and if she’ll sell Raj down the river. Also hotly anticipated- what DC will wear to the appearance. When we first laid eyes on the analyst as she was being escorted by the cops out of her building over a year ago, Chiesi was sporting wet hair and an oversized sweater; some made comparisons to Bridget Nielsen’s look, circa the Flava Flav relationship. Then, months later, she showed up at a courthouse looking like this. Read more »

Prudential Douglas Elliman broker Darren Sukenik has rules for people who come to his open houses: have the cash to buy what he’s selling, don’t waste his time, and do not bring god knows whatever is on your shoes into this apartment. In order to ensure prospective buyers abide by commandment number three, Sukenik typically insists people either take off their shoes before entering or cover them with “surgical booties.” Explaining his rationale, he told the Times, “[These] apartments are precious…you want to make it feel like a jewel box. You wouldn’t wear construction boots in a jewel box.”

Usually, people play by Sukenik’s rules. There is one group of people, however, who’ve brought some friction to the table.

Mr. Sukenik said that in the past, some buyers, especially hedge fund executives who view it “humbling” to bare their feet, have angrily stormed out.

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  • 21 Jul 2010 at 12:29 PM

Tools Of The Trade: Some Fresh Beats

Is your boss the type to JUST BLATHER ON as though anyone gives a shit re: what he has to say because what? His name/initials are on the door? As you can’t very well just get up and leave or whip out the wrap it up box, you’re probably looking for new and inventive ways to describe his painful monologues/speeches to your colleagues and friends. To that end, might we suggest “ball-achingly indulgent”? Read more »

  • 13 Jul 2010 at 12:47 PM

Looking For That Extra Edge?

Are you old as fuck? I mean, for Wall Street, what with all the whippsnappers running wild, not for, like, the earth? Might we suggest an age-old technique for getting that spring back in your step that apparently fell out of fashion almost 100 years ago but is surely set to make a comeback, probably with even better results due to advances in medicine and technology? Read more »