Lehman Brothers

Hugh 'Skip' McGee II.GIFHugh “Skip” McGee III is not happy. The former Lehman Brothers head of investment banking/current Barclays employee of the same title is specifically not happy with the hippies at The Kinkaid School. You see, kids, The Kinkaid School is an institution Skippy spends good money to send his children to and lately? The commune seems to be poisoning the McGees’ minds in a dangerous way. And to be honest, Skip has had it. He’s held his tongue ’til now but not anymore. So what’s going to happen, is Skip is going to sit down and lose his shit in a letter to the school, demanding the dismissal of a whole buncha personnel, and come seriously close to giving himself a hernia. You wanna know why? Skip’s got three reasons:
1. The school made a bunch of high school boys very upset (not just upset, “humiliated”) when it wouldn’t let them dress in drag for a pep rally.
2. Something about “a gay female coach” (Skip’s original draft: “fucking dyke”) who The Skipper wants fired.
3. (The pièce de résistance:) History teacher Leslie Lovett should also be fired because she injects her ‘leftist invective’ in the curriculum and said mean, hurtful things about investment bankers, particularly those working for Lehman and Barclays, and made Skippy’s son cry. Luckily, Skip Jr. wiped his eyes, stood up to Ms. Lovett and said, you are wrong about my dad! He wanted to save Lehman. He wanted to save Lehman so bad!
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Skip is deadly serious about these charges (if his demands are not met he’s threatening to pull his third child out of the school and send her to another Houston prep school), so we strongly suggest you read the entire thing. We almost didn’t post this because it starts off kind of slow and we got distracted by other stuff. Then something, I don’t know what– the ghost of Dick Fuld, with whom the Skipper has some beef– told us to give it a second look. Thank god we did, or we would’ve missed gems like:

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Jimmy Cayne Bear Stearns JP Morgan Collapse Buyout.JPGIt turns out that the next best thing to running a successful bank may well be running a catastrophically unsuccessful one.
At the very least, Dicky Fuld and Jimmy Cayne did very, very well for themselves according to a new report from a bunch of Harvard Law School eggheads. So did their buddies: Executives at the late Bear Stearns and Lehman Brothers took home some $2.5 billion in cash over the last nine years of the banks’ all-too-short lives.
The report shows that the top five executives at each firm walked away with $250 million apiece on average from 2000 until last year when both firms ceased to be able to pay huge bonuses or to, you know, function. Everyone’s favorite pothead cashed out a comfortable $388 million, which should keep him well-supplied for some time. Wall Street’s cutest primate, for his part, banked $541 million.

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Were you a member of an elite group of individuals taken before their time known as the Lehman Brothers associate class of 2008? Were you robbed of the chance to toil under the Gorilla for more than a few weeks because oops the firm went out of business? (And speaking of that: do you blame yourself? Dick Fuld certainly does.) Those $40k signing bonuses you got and probably already spent are going to need to be paid back, ASAP.

The requests are allegedly coming from PricewaterhouseCoopers, which is administering Lehman’s estate in the UK. “More than 60% of my class received this letter around two weeks ago,” says one former Lehman associate. “We’re seeking legal opinions on whether we have to pay it back.”

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Screen shot 2009-10-20 at 3.30.18 PM.pngSo Hank Paulson held secret meetings with Goldman in a hotel room in Russia and now we also find out, from Andrew Ross Sorkin’s new book, that matchmakers Paulson and Geither arranged a midnight meeting between Dick Fuld and Ken Lewis on Monday, July 21, 2008 to discuss the possibility of something going down between the two men’s firms. The rendez-vous took place after a dinner honoring the then Treasury Secretary, at which all of Wall Street’s CEO’s were assembled and one sort of gets the impression that maybe if Geithner had thought to talk Fuld/Lehman up to Lewis a little more (“he’s a grower, not a shower”), and told Fuld “for god’s sake, don’t look so desperate, play it cool,” the outcome might’ve been different. (It probably also would’ve required Richard to not be delusional about what he was trying to sell which, admittedly, TG couldn’t have helped.)

As the dinner was ending, Mr. Geithner, approached Mr. Lewis and, leaning close, whispered, “I believe you have a meeting with Dick.”
“Yeah, I do,” Mr. Lewis replied.
Mr. Geithner gave him directions to a side room where the two could speak in private. He had apparently already given Mr. Fuld the same instructions, because Mr. Lewis noticed him across the room looking back at them like a nervous date.

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dick_fuld.03.jpgMark your calendars ladies because on November 1 Lehman Brothers will start hawking the artwork that once graced the walls of Dick Fuld’s office, executive dining room, gym and lobby. Barclays had one year from the time it purchased Mr. Fuld’s domain to buy the photos and drawings, which the Brits unceremoniously declined, along with the dog. Up for grabs are Lichtenstein’s “I Love Liberty,” expected to go for $25,000, a few $500 photos, and several charcoal drawings Erin Callan did of The Gorilla when they were on better terms. Surely there’s something in there for everyone. Write a check today. If not for a love of art, then do it for the creditors who are owed $250 billion but most especially former prez Joe Gregory, who is waiting for $233 million in deferred comp and is getting antsier with each passing day. We haven’t seen it up close but Callan is said to have gotten the shading on the nipples exactly right. That’s gotta be a collector’s item.

It’s sort of odd that Lehman is “sitting on 500,000 pounds” of yellowcake uranium. Not because it is odd for firms not directly in the business to own an interest in the element. This is quite common actually as uranium futures are actually traded now. What is unusual is that Lehman would seem to have taken physical delivery- a scenario which would imply licensing and a host of regulatory headaches that seem silly when you can trade cash settled futures contracts if you really want to play the metal. In any case, Lehman acquired the stuff “under a matured commodities contract.” (Read: The contract expired and they were forced to accept physical delivery). Now they are stuck with a pile of the stuff in Canada- where no one wants it, and in a down market.
Doh.
Lehman Sits on Bomb of Uranium Cake as Prices Slump [Bloomberg]

  • 26 Jan 2009 at 10:19 AM

The Virtues Of Insurance

Typically when Congress can’t get the political backing to actually pass a bill to pay for something, they do the next best thing: get the political backing to guarantee something, or insure any losses. At the very least this reduces the cost of capital for the activity. Throw some tax benefits in and you go a long way to encouraging the behavior you are trying to stimulate. So potent can the effect be that you don’t even necessarily need a direct guarantee. (The “too big to fail” condition and the “implicit guarantee” of a Fannie Mae is a good example here).
Alea points us to a Financial Times piece this morning that hints at the use of that kind of backing. To wit:

Forcing institutions to raise capital, be it private or public, at panic-driven fire sale prices threatens enormous dilutions to already shell-shocked shareholders, further exacerbating uncertainty and fuelling the downward spiral. This is self-defeating.
The question then is whether it is feasible to run a (nearly) capital-less financial system until panic subsides. If it is, then a solution to the financial crisis is in sight since it would free up trillions of dollars of hard to raise funds, covering more than even the most extreme estimate of losses.
I believe it is feasible to run such a system for a while, because, essentially, distressed financial institutions need (regulatory) capital for two basic purposes: To act as a buffer for negative shocks, and to reduce their risk-shifting incentives by exposing them to their losses.
However these two functions can be replaced, respectively, by the provision of a comprehensive public insurance, and by strict (and intrusive) government supervision while this insurance is in place.

We call the plan “Back Up and Bully.”
The problem with this level of insurance is that while it preserves public capital (and prevents dilution) you can write a lot of insurance before anyone starts to notice that you are on the hook for, well, a lot of insurance. (See e.g., Fannie and Freddie).
Caballero is thin on details, particularly the part about how the day-to-day operations of a “capital-less” bank work. We wonder after these details. In the present situation a good share of the capital being raised is likely to actually cover losses. An interesting side effect of mark-to-myth accounting is that you might not trigger capital and margin calls based on those marks right away, but they could well be coming in short order. We tend to think that the Treasury knew a bit more than it was telling about the state of bank balance sheets early in the crisis. A capital-less solution might not be as practical as it looks here. Still, it’s fun to dream- and not every case is a lost cause for this solution.
A capital-less financial system [The Financial Times]