As you may have heard, this Saturday night, Lenny Dykstra will box former co-worker Jose Canseco, in a title fight** that will be live-streamed for your viewing pleasure. Canseco was originally scheduled to go head to head with the husband of a Real Housewives cast member but “graciously” agreed to bow out after Nails “called and begged to take his place against Canseco” who, according to LD, “ruined my career by spreading lies.” All of which got us thinking– since Lenny a) is in serious need of some cash, b) not doing much these days, and c) probably looking to work out some of the aggression he feels toward people who’ve brought his life to the place it is today, perhaps he should consider fighting the other individuals who “ruined” things for him? Continue reading »
lies
Who Should Pay For Ruining Lenny Dykstra’s Various Post-Baseball Ventures And Hobbies?
By Bess LevinPoll Results Indicates 75% Of Wall Street Lies And/Or Jokes Around At Least Half The Time
By Bess LevinOr maybe the people who said they’d take ten to fifty percent pay cuts in exchange for a ‘dream’ gig in the financial services industry were being serious? Continue reading »
Clients Going To Goldman Sachs For Something Other Than Having Hair Stroked, Emotional Needs Met
By Bess Levin
“Goldman’s clients are telling the firm, ‘Yes, you make us money. Yes, you’re the best on the Street. But, no, I don’t trust you,’ ” said one source. “Goldman isn’t there to give you the warm and fuzzies,” said a executive at a rival bank. “But there’s a sense on the Street that you want them in your corner in a pinch.” [NYP]
What has Neel Kashkari been up to lately? Chopping wood, mostly, in attempt to “decompress” from the stress of last year, up at a “secluded mountain cabin” in California. Getting away from it all has helped Hank Paulson’s little buddy center himself and offered some serious time for reflection. And up there, in the woods, decked out in flannel, know what he’s reflected on a whole lot? The fact that his former employer, who will not be name-checked at this time for security purposes, is full of shit. (Leaving names out of this on the off-chance Kash-K decides he wants to return to the golden ball pit.)
“Every single Wall Street firm, despite their protest today, every single one benefited from our actions,” he said. “And when they get up there and say, ‘Well, we didn’t need it,’ that’s bull.
“They did need it. And they’re all happy with the actions that we took, and they need to show restraint today.”
As for you, Representative Cummings, why don’t you come out to my cabin and we’ll settle once and for all who the chump is? Let’s see your clippers.
The Economic Bomb That Didn’t Drop [NYT via NYM]
Here are five statements recently made by five different money managers:
* You will get your Q3 letter before the end of Q4
* No, I’m not retiring so that I can start Long Island’s first tobacco plantation
* Ball parking it, our assets under management are in the range of this figure
* If you fucksticks don’t get it together I’m going to seriously consider eliminating KFC Fridays.
* Trust me, the 3&50 is worth it. You’re on a gravy train with biscuit wheels.
According to a new study, one of them is a lie.