Long Island

  • 25 Sep 2013 at 4:37 PM

A Portrait of the Artist As A Young Man

Steve Cohen circa 1974, from the pages of a Great Neck North Senior High School yearbook, from the investigative geniuses at the Wall Street Journal. [WSJ]

You’re going to have to try a lot harder than strippers, black jack, and a leased Mercedes to impress us. You’re competing with people who’ve spent millions on Caramel Macchiatos and priceless Teddy Bear collections. Think outside the box for once in your life. Read more »

In 2008, Fursa Strategic Alternatives, an asset management firm run by Massapequa resident William F. Harley III, informed investors that it would be closing its doors and returning everyone’s money. As some money managers can likely attest though, making the decision to close up shop (and writing people to say as much), doesn’t mean you’re emotionally ready to do so. Harley, for example, couldn’t shake the feeling that he was put on this earth to be an investor and, god damn it, he was going to invest until the day he died. So he did what any rational human being in his position would, and decided to just, you know, hang on to his clients’ money for a while. Of course, the pesky little varmints kept calling, so he had to disconnect the phones and to avoid an awkward confrontation wherein they appeared at the firm’s building demanding their cash in person, he moved HQ into the basement of one of his other businesses, a Hooters restaurant. That got people off his tail for a while but, unfortunately, they popped up again and this time are taking legal action. Read more »

  • 25 Jul 2012 at 4:24 PM

Sleep Where Joe Gregory Hath Slept

The former Lehman Brothers chief operating officer and close personal friend of Dick Fuld has reportedly put his Lloyd Harbor. For $22 million you get a 15,000-square-foot main house, a 6,000-square-foot guest house, nine acres, 6 bedrooms, 8.5 baths, a 7 car garage, what appears to be a duplex apartment for shoes, and a little piece of history. Plus, you’d read be helping out the guy, who never collected his $230 million in deferred compensation. [Dealbook]

Remember Tara Obernauer? For a quick refresher, Obernauer is vice-president at Forbes Private Capital Group, whose resume also includes an MBA from Hofstra, five years as a compliance officer at Guggenheim Capital Markets, and dancing gig at a now-defunct gentlemen’s club called Stringfellows, where she earned “$1,000 a night or more.” Last July she started having an affair with Nassau County police officer Mike Tedesco,* which involved Tedesco literally and figuratively “parking his cruiser in Obernauer’s driveway” during his shift and “hanging out on the couch, watching TV, and taking naps” while letting younger cops, who Tedesco referred to “assist bitches,” respond to calls. The reason we know all this is that Mike’s bosses “compared reports by Obernauer’s neighbors with GPS records from his squad car, [which] showed at least 57 visits” at times he was supposed to be working, and then cross-referenced them with Obernauer, who had no intention of covering for Tedesco after she learned he was married with kids.

Anyway, in April Obernauer got an order of protection against the guy, fearing retaliation for not telling Internal Affairs that he was “just a friend who stops by once in a while,” as per his request,** and now she wants Nassau County to cough up a few million for unleashing this animal on her. Read more »

In 1992, Tara Obenauer was a dancer at a now-defunct gentleman’s club called Stringfellows. The Long Island native had graduated from Adelphi University the year prior and was set to attend law school but, she told the New York Times for an article titled “Topless Bars For A Crowd In Pin Stripes,” “The money here is just so good. I can make $1,000 a night or more, if I really work at it.” Obenauer worked hard for the money a few years longer and following a brief interlude as a stay-at-home mom, received her MBA from Hofstra and got a job at Guggenheim Capital Markets, where she spent five years as a compliance officer before joining Forbes Private Capital Group as a Vice-President. If Mike Tedesco, the Long Island police officer who used to two-time his wife with Obenauer had taken a page from her playbook, maybe he would have been lieutenant or something by now. Unfortunately, none of Obenauer’s can-do work ethic rubbed off on Tedesco and this had to happen: Read more »

  • 24 Oct 2011 at 3:08 PM

This Post Brought To You By Occupy Wall StreetTM

Citing the potential of “Occupy Wall Street” to become a “global brand,” a Long Island couple has filed to trademark the name of the amorphous organization responsible for the protests and encampments in lower Manhattan and other U.S. cities…In a U.S. Patent and Trademark Office (USPTO) application, Robert and Diane Maresca are seeking to trademark the phrase “Occupy Wall St.” so that they can place it on a wide variety of goods, including bumper stickers, shirts, beach bags, footwear, umbrellas, and hobo bags. [TSG]