Noah ‘Judas’ Freeman

If you are a hedge fund manager who goes by the name Steven A. Cohen, there are a few things you really don’t want to hear first thing in the morning. They include:

a) “You might not want to put that whiteboard marker in your mouth

b) “The fleeces are on back order”

c) “Your ex-wife is in the lobby”

d) “There’s a photographer here who said he’s been authorized to shoot you wearing a king’s robe and crown for a set of playing cards”

e) “You’ve been outmaneuvered for the Toledo Mud Hens. But I hear the Binghamton Mets may be available.”

f) “One of your former employees told the FBI you regularly trade on material non-public information.”

No one has sodomized anyone with any foreign objects lately, the supplier got the message (“That shipment will be here in the next hour or you’ll find out what it’s like to be dragged down the BQE via Zamboni”) loud and clear, Patty C is sitting this round out, photoshoots have been banned, and baseball in general can go fuck itself, so the mood at 72 Cummings Point Road today can likely be attributed to this:

A former SAC Capital Advisors LP portfolio manager told the FBI it was “understood” that those assigned to give their best trading ideas to founder Steven A. Cohen would provide him with insider information, according to an agent’s notes of the conversation. The former fund manager, Noah Freeman, pleaded guilty to securities fraud in February 2011 after speaking to Federal Bureau of Investigation agents and federal prosecutors in New York in late 2010, in a so-called proffer session. Defendants use such sessions to determine whether to cooperate with the government against others. “At SAC Capital you were expected to provide your trading ideas to Cohen,” Freeman said, according to a Dec. 16, 2010, memo written by FBI Special Agent B.J. Kang. “Freeman and others at SAC Capital understood that providing Cohen with your best trading ideas involved providing Cohen with inside information.”

Doesn’t sound good! But before anyone launches himself into space in a rocket disguised as a Bob’s Big Boy statue, let’s stop to consider that: Read more »

Remember Noah Freeman? To recap, he’s the former SAC trader who, in addition to taking part in an insider trading scheme, committed an arguably worse** crime (within a crime) when he stabbed his best friend, Donald Longueuil in the back. Despite splitting the work of obtaining and trading on material non-public information from a lobster-loving tyrant 50/50, Judas Freeman decided that Don, the guy who served as best man at his wedding and who prior to that happy day, helped him “get out of bed in the morning” following a bout of depression on account of being dumped by his previous fiancée, should be the one to take the brunt of the punishment. That’s why he agreed to wear a wire and coax Longueuil into incriminating himself on tape on four separate occasions, which finally paid off when Don gave Judas a riveting blow by blow account of exactly how he destroyed evidence of the insider trading they both took part in.

In exchange for selling his friend down the river, Freeman was given permission to go on vacation with his wife (first to Puerto Rico, then the U.S. Virgin Islands, which he’d been looking forward to for months). Now, at first glance, this seems fairly ice cold. Colder than the ice Judas and Don once glided down, hand in hand, even. One might even get the impression that Judas believed  friends who will not only share your interest in ice skating but who will nurse you back to health following an emotional breakdown and give a bang-up speech at your wedding grow on trees. But maybe it didn’t go down like that? Maybe Judas tried desperately to avoid betraying the one person who was always there for him? Maybe he told the Feds they could go to hell and he didn’t jump at the chance to save himself on the back of Donald? Unfortunately, the evidence suggests otherwise. Read more »

  • 29 Sep 2011 at 1:53 PM

P.S. You’re Not Allowed To Trade Anymore

This probably doesn’t come as much of a surprise, considering he was already found guilty of insider trading and sentenced to two and a half years in prison but that doesn’t make it sting any less: Donald Longueuil, who the feds were able to bring charges against after his colleague, accomplice and so-called best friend Noah Freeman agreed to record conversations with Don in exchange for a lesser sentence, during which Don was heard on tape saying re: his USB flash drive: Read more »