It’s not that they want to, as it would go against everything the Commission stands for (incompetence, letting frauds run rampant), not to mention seriously cut in on everyone’s porn surfing time. It’s just that, (no) thanks to the infernal examiner’s report, they might have, or risk looking worse than they already do.** Continue reading »
porn
The SEC fucks up a lot. A whole lot. This is more or less a given. David Einhorn has been saying this for eons– from personal experience, having dealt with the brain trust in the case of Allied Capital–, as has Bernie Madoff who, from the jail cell in which he rots, made no bones about the fact that he was eternally grateful that the regulator operated at the intelligence level wherein it wouldn’t know not to stick its (collective) dick in a pencil sharpener. Still, for those of you who need just a little more proof, SEC inspector general David Kotz is happy to add some color.
About two miles separate the Securities and Exchange Commission’s headquarters in Washington from the offices of Allied Capital, a District-based private-equity company. But over the course of an 18-month government probe into whether Allied Capital overstated the value of its holdings, nobody from the regulator ever visited the firm to ask questions, according to a new, internal SEC review that raises questions about the agency’s oversight of the financial industry.
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MBAs
Let It Be Known, The CFA Will Not Have Its Name Tainted By Images Of Taints
By Bess Levin
I see your precious 3 letters and raise you 3 of my own: S a D
For those of you currently debating whether or not obtaining a CFA charter is worth flushing several years of your life down the toilet, I’d like you to consider one thing. When and if you finally do pass that third exam do you want the institute to own your ass? Budding pornographers, erotic novelists and really anyone with a taste for the finer things in life should think long and hard. Nickolas Keith Gustafsson (pictured) knows what we’re talking about. From the March/April CFA Magazine/Journal of Shame:
A few weeks ago, an unnamed Securities and Exchange Commission worker got in a bit of trouble with his employer for checking out a little porn while on the job. Mystery Man made at least 1,800 logged attempts to check out some sites that included www.ladyboyx.com, www.ladyboyjuice.com, www.trannytit.com, and www.anal-sins.com, which, he admitted, “were kind of distraction per se.” But he had a good reason for what we personally think is a very mild offense, which is that he had a lot of work to do, and it was stressing him out. And without knowing the facts, many have just been so quick to judge, without really hearing the guy out, which we think is unfair, and not the way *you* would want to be treated, were you to find yourself in the position of having to defend time spent on TrannyTit. You’d want a chance to explain yourself, and since surely this fellow does too, we’ve excerpted the relevant portions of his conversation with the lawyer sent in to investigate the matter. First, some background:
Next, Q&A:
Q: Can you say how long you may have been engaged in viewing pornography? Is it a recent development?
A: I don’t know if I can give you a time frame in all honesty… I guess depending on how you define “a long time.” I think, you know, there’s clearly probably times like I said earlier, where you know, I did not look at this material, did not search for the material, you know. I think the frequency increased as I felt a little more stressed, which was kind of very cyclical in nature, I think, because then, you know, I’d have work to do and would then have to take it home and work, you know, just to keep up. And then that would stress me out even more, you know.
Q: Our records show that on Wednesday, August 20th, beginning at 3:17PM, you made approximately 385 attempts to access a website called www.ladyboyx.com. Do you have recollection of attempting to access this site?
A: I do not. But as I indicated previously, that, you know, would not necessarily surprise me. Continue reading »
Securities and Exchange Commission Missed Madoff ‘Cause Employees Were Busy Looking At Porn
By Bess Levin
Not judging, and, actually, maybe this makes the Team SEC look a little better than before? It’s not that they were deaf/dumb/stupid, they were just otherwise occupied/had their hands full? Don’t think I’m reaching here.
The work computer of one regional supervisor for the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission showed more than 1,800 attempts to look up pornography in a 17-day span: “It was kind of distraction per se,” he later told investigators.
But he wasn’t alone. More than two dozen SEC employees and contractors over roughly the past two years have faced internal investigations after they were caught viewing pornography on their government computers, according to records obtained through the Freedom of Information Act and other public documents.
Double fist pump for DoubleLine LLC! Earlier this week, when we discussed the matter of Jeffrey Gundlach, who’s being sued by his former employer, TCW, for conspiracy, unfair competition, theft of proprietary and having dozens upon dozens of dildos, hardcore pornos, spank rags and weed in his office, a few of you wondered if there would be any sort of fall-out for Gunds. Would his new clients take issue with his admission to keeping, among other things, Weapons of Ass Destruction, Dr. Fellatio 16, a 6-inch brown rubber penis, an 8-inch glass penis and a pink and black strap restraining device in his office? Would the colleagues who followed him out the door of TCW be regretting their decision? No word yet on how clients feel about all this but apparently the defectors like it just fine and they’ve convinced their friends to get on board the Trip Down Mammary Lane train. At least 7 TCW employees have joined the new shop as of yesterday.
Did the last Frederick’s of Hollywood catalogue fail to make it to your doorstep? Does your employer frown upon your surfing for porn on the job? CNBC is here to lend a helping hand, having uploaded some of their favorite little numbers to the site. If you’re wondering why they didn’t just have the on-air talent model these things, perhaps you’ve failed that remember that CNBC is a serious business network for serious investors, who wouldn’t take MCC or Dennis Kneale seriously if they showed up on Power Lunch in something like this:
- Use the Bloomberg command
NH BLG_DEALBREAKER <GO>
to access Dealbreaker
