rewards

  • 30 Jul 2014 at 6:13 PM

Broker Junkets Are Back (But Only 70% As Drunk)

Time was, if you were a successful broker on Wall Street, your company sent you on trips to mingle with other top producing brokers, at which the only planned activities included playing golf, getting drunk, and falling ass-backward into the pool. Then the financial crisis hit and suddenly firms couldn’t afford the bad press associated with a gaggle of their employees passing out naked on the ninth hole at the Ritz Carlton in Half Moon Bay. Well now they can! Read more »

  • 15 Nov 2012 at 6:27 PM

Bonus Watch ’12: SEC Whistleblowers

The Securities and Exchange Commission said Thursday it received more than 3,000 tips in the past fiscal year. The SEC said the tips — 3,001 in all — came from all 50 states, Washington, D.C., Puerto Rico and from 49 countries. It announced the findings in a report required by the Dodd-Frank Act on the activity of the SEC’s whistleblower office, which opened its doors in August last year…Under the program created by the Dodd-Frank Act, whistleblowers can receive a 10% to 30% reward if they provide original information that leads to a successful enforcement case netting a penalty of $1 million or more. The SEC issued its first reward under the program on Aug. 21 to an informant who didn’t want to be identified. The whistleblower received $50,000, or 30% of the $150,000 thus far reclaimed out of the multimillion-dollar fraud the person prevented, the SEC said at the time. [WSJ]

4:00-4:05 Either people who have never taken part in a conference call are participating today and pressing buttons on their phone every five seconds or someone is thrusting someone else up against their office phone over and over and over again.
4:06 Gundlach is offering $1 million for information leading to the return of each stolen piece of the Mondrian and $500,000 for the Jasper Johns and Joseph Cornell pieces. $200,00 for information in general still stands.
4:07 Buttons are still being pressed, now sirens in the background. Shouts of “what the fuck is going on here” are heard.
4:08 Talking Heads’ “This Must Be The Place” is now playing (over the sirens).
4:10 Someone is still tapping their pound key and while no one officially ends the call, Gundlach/whoever is running this seem to have lost interest and leave without saying good-bye. Read more »

As you may have heard, at some point last week, bond manager Jeffrey Gundlach was robbed. Thieves took $10 million worth of stuff from the Doubleline founder’s Santa Monica pad, including a couple of paintings, a few watches, some high-priced wine, a 2010 Porsche Carrera 4S, and whatever cash was lying around. While it’s unclear if the burglars made away with Gundlach’s collection of priceless pornographic films and sexual apparatus; if he was targeted specifically because the thieves knew they could get their hands on the original copy of Dr. Fellatio 16; or if they were tipped off by JG’s regular pizza delivery guy, cable repairman, or pool boy, what is clear that Gundlach is pissed, pissed like a man who is no longer in possession of Ass Traffic Volume 2: The Director’s Cut.  And that’s where you come in. Read more »

Remember Bradley Birkenfeld? He’s the guy who single-handedly made the government’s case against UBS and forced the Swiss bank to hand over the names of thousands of tax cheats, which resulted in the US scoring $780 million from UBS and may have inspired some 33,000 Americans to “voluntarily disclose offshore accounts to the IRS, generating more than $5 billion.” And yet, despite his assistance, Birkenfeld wasn’t immediately thanked for a job well done. Instead, he was sentenced to forty months in prison (fair-ish, considering he showed a few clients how to avoid paying taxes himself) and told to piss off by the Internal Revenue Service, from whom he sought an award, because he was “not forthcoming about his own role in the scheme,” even as a Justice Department attorney admitted that “…without Mr. Birkenfeld walking into the door of the Department of Justice in the summer of 2007, I doubt as of today that this massive fraud would have been discovered by the US government” (or as his lawyer put it, “They didn’t know how to spell UBS until he showed up. He didn’t just give them a piece of the puzzle. He gave them the entire puzzle”). Now, after doing 32 months at Schuylkill Federal Correctional Institution, getting let out early on account of “good-time credit,” and living in a halfway house in New Hampshire, Birkenfeld has finally been thrown a bone. Read more »

A couple months back we offered some advice to those considering taking up the insider trading game. It was that you strongly consider a) NOT discussing your activities with your spouse or b) vow now, no matter how bad it gets, to stay married to this guy or girl, ’cause if you don’t he/she will throw it all back in your face in an attempt to get you nailed to the wall. If you don’t listen to every damn word we have to say, we can’t help you. You’ve made your bed, etc. Now here’s a little 411 for the other side: should your marriage fall apart, and should you have an inkling your former partner was trading on some material non-public information, and should you be looking for a little payback in the form of cash-money– would one million dollars do the trick?