• Your money is safe with this lion, who is unfamiliar with the word "homophone"

    Hedge Funds, News

    SEC Advises Investors To Read Hedge Fund Documents, Especially The Secret Ones Containing All The Fraud

    I think if I were running a small hedge fund far from prying eyes, every quarter I’d take a look at my performance and decide if I felt good about it, and then (1) if I did I’d take a nice chunk of the profits for myself and (2) if I didn’t then I’d drink […]

    / Oct 3, 2012 at 5:35 PM
  • Isn't it weird that robot traders are sort of perceived as dorky math-nerd robots but actual traders all, like, played lacrosse? This robot probably plays lacrosse.


    Broker Fined For Helping Some Robots Rip Off Other Robots

    What is your model of the SEC’s recent crackdown on the naughty forms of high-frequency trading? I don’t really like mine, and my model of high-frequency trading in general is pretty weak, so I hesitate to speculate. Here is me hesitating. Okay! Now let’s speculate. Go read this this SEC press release, or don’t really, […]

    / Sep 25, 2012 at 5:57 PM
  • FYI, never search Google Images for "computer penis"


    NYSE Fined For Selling Product That Was Too Good

    The standard illustration of the efficient markets hypothesis is the thing about the economists and the $20 bill on the ground, but it is so old and stale at this point that Matt Yglesias had to invent a new version this week, and it’s something like “if you find a penis-enlarging injection on the ground, […]

    / Sep 14, 2012 at 3:01 PM
  • News

    There’s Already An Investment Strategy Called ‘Buckets Of Money’

    I just thought you should know. To those of you who had your heart set on naming one of your models or funds just that, I’m sorry. It’s not only taken but now tainted with charges of securities violations. Back to the drawing board. [MarketWatch]

    / Sep 5, 2012 at 6:41 PM
  • If I'm ever named SEC commissioner, I will totally pose for my official photo in front of a Cayman Islands flag. OH HOW WE'LL LAUGH.


    Bloomberg Reveals That SEC Commissioners Have Friends (Who Are Former SEC Commissioners)

    Bloomberg has a big article today about former SEC commissioner Annette Nazareth’s current work as a Davis Polk lawyer-lobbyist-fixer for the financial industry that is sort of sneery but still interesting. It’s a long litany of her quasi-misdeeds in dealing with her former agency, although at paragraph 738 there’s an obligatory “no indication Nazareth violated […]

    / Sep 5, 2012 at 5:51 PM
  • Unrelatedly, I'm not sure I'd invest with DEF no matter what their fees.


    SEC Finds Retail Investors Too Stupid To Invest Without SEC Assistance

    This is boring but short so focus for a minute, there will be an easy quiz: So assuming that the value of the assets in your account managed by DEF totaled $450,000, what advisory fee will you be charged? Is it: I know, I know, you cheated: the right answer is the one highlighted in […]

    / Aug 30, 2012 at 5:35 PM
  • Tell her all about it.

    Hedge Funds

    New SEC Rules Practically Require Hedge Funds To Advertise On Dealbreaker

    The day when you can advertise your hedge fund on Dealbreaker creeps ever closer, so claim your spot now because they are going fast.* The SEC has shown some justifiable skepticism about implementing the JOBS Act, and at least SEC-ster thinks that it’s been dragging its feet on the hedge fund advertising rules, but still, […]

    / Aug 29, 2012 at 3:48 PM
  • The letter is very good, you can tell that someone at the SEC had fun writing it and then someone else had less fun editing it to remove things like "look you pinhead, ..."


    SEC Not Going To Let Bankers And Research Analysts Nod Hello To Each Other In The Hallway Just Because Congress Told It To

    The SEC had a feisty week last week, telling off Congress with cheery abandon. Darrell Issa sent them a pretty crazy letter a few months back demanding that all IPOs be Dutch auctions for some reason, and last week Mary Schapiro sent him a deeply researched 32-page letter telling him, with appropriate condescension, that that […]

    / Aug 27, 2012 at 6:08 PM
  • News

    Bonus Watch ’12: SEC Whistleblowers

    A whistleblower who helped the Securities and Exchange Commission stop a multi-million dollar fraud will receive nearly $50,000 — the first payout from a new SEC program to reward people who provide evidence of securities fraud. The award represents 30 percent of the amount collected in an SEC enforcement action against the perpetrators of the […]

    / Aug 21, 2012 at 4:49 PM
  • He's personally affronted


    SEC Wants Activist Hedge Funds To Share With The Rest Of The Class

    Financial markets are basically about information asymmetries, real and imagined, and financial regulation is largely about limiting those asymmetries to socially acceptable kinds and quantities. A general rule for trading success – perhaps the only useful rule for trading success – is: if you know something that nobody else knows and that will increase the […]

    / Aug 15, 2012 at 6:15 PM
  • John Stumpf hasn't read the PPM either. But who could resist that face?


    Wells Fargo Is A Little Sorry That It Sold Securities It Knew Nothing About

    Don’t do this: One particular municipal entity had been a customer of Wells Fargo, or a predecessor, since at least 1988. This customer’s investment objectives were safety of principal and income. … Wells Fargo’s internal records for the customer’s account specifically stated that the account should not invest in MBS. In addition, applicable state law […]

    / Aug 14, 2012 at 5:02 PM
  • This money is just so happy to be hanging out with its friends, the other piles of money.


    Money Market Funds Can Lose Money, Just Not Your Money

    Money market mutual funds are among other things “mutual funds,” meaning that they’re piles of stuff owned by people called “shareholders.” The shareholders ultimately own the stuff, so if you put $100 into a money market fund and it invests it in stuff and the stuff loses half its value then you should only get […]

    / Aug 9, 2012 at 6:16 PM
  • Mary Schapiro: probably not working at Goldman Sachs soon, but who knows?


    SEC Lawyers Annoy Their Way Into The Hearts Of Private-Sector Employers

    So let’s say you’re a bank and, redundantly, you are in trouble with the SEC. And you want to hire a new lawyer to get you out of that trouble, because your old lawyers got you into it. You decide, sensibly, to hire a lawyer directly from the SEC, both because those lawyers have valuable […]

    / Aug 6, 2012 at 12:22 PM
  • Jed Rakoff is (1) the judge in the case and (2) delightfully smiley.


    Federal Jury Doesn’t Want SEC To Take This The Wrong Way, But It Thinks This Citi CDO Case Is Bullshit

    So remember when Citi did that thing that was all the rage in 2007 where they constructed a synthetic CDO referencing mortgage-backed securities in order to facilitate their own prop bet against those MBS, but then maybe inadequately disclosed to investors that they were in fact naked short those MBS? And then they got sued […]

    / Jul 31, 2012 at 5:29 PM
  • Buzzfeed's 25 Photos of Mitt Romney Looking Perfectly Normal: Amazing


    Mitt Romney, Bill Ackman Undone By Forms

    Let’s talk about two tenuously related stories about government filings, why not. I don’t have much to say about this Mitt Romney Bain thing today but go read it, it is fascinating. Basically Mitt Romney certified under penalty of perjury in some federal electoral forms* that he was not involved with Bain Capital after 1999, […]

    / Jul 12, 2012 at 5:30 PM
  • Hedge Funds, News

    Phil Falcone Is Preparing For Trial On SEC Fraud Charges By Alienating All Of His Witnesses

    Even if Wilbur doesn’t testify I’m pretty sure that a trial of the SEC/Falcone case will be something to behold – if it happens, which the public posturing suggests it will. The Journal previews his defense today and it sounds like courtroom tensions will run high: Mr. Falcone plans to try deflecting blame to a […]

    / Jul 5, 2012 at 5:42 PM
  • News

    Phil Falcone’s Alleged Piggish Behavior Made Him Some Enemies

    If you knew nothing about Phil Falcone but what you read in the SEC’s assortment of complaints against him today, you would probably conclude that he’s kind of a dick. The loan thing, of course – Falcone borrowed $113mm from Harbinger at the same time he was preventing investors from withdrawing their money – but […]

    / Jun 27, 2012 at 4:30 PM
  • News

    Market Volatility Soon To Be Just A Distant Memory

    So, um, news today, not great, huh? So no surprise that stocks are down. It’s okay though, since the SEC has cooked up a cure: The Securities and Exchange Commission has approved two proposals submitted by the national securities exchanges and the Financial Industry Regulatory Authority (FINRA) that are designed to address extraordinary volatility in […]

    / Jun 1, 2012 at 1:55 PM

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