Structured Portfolio Management
May 2010, Structured Portfolio Management founder Don Brownstein is said to “walk around [a] crowded conference room table while slapping the palm of his hand with a baseball bat, stopping behind [a trader] while stating, ‘I’ll kill you if you leave. The only way you can leave this firm is in a body bag.'” January 2012, Millenium Laboratories really cranks things up a notch re: suggestion of what fate will befall people who attempt to leave their company:
Don Browstein is a former philosophy professor, the founder of Structured Portfolio Management (named the best performing hedge fund in 2010, after returning 49.5 percent and 134.6 percent in 2009), a guy who supposedly once told a trader “The only way you can leave this firm is in a body bag” while brandishing a baseball bat, and the person tenants will have to answer to if next month’s rent is one day late.
Don Brownstein’s Structured Portfolio Management LLC plans to start a fund to buy and rent out homes. The firm, based in Stamford, Connecticut, may introduce the fund to investors within weeks, Brownstein said in a letter to clients dated June 12, a copy of which was obtained by Bloomberg News. He didn’t say how much capital has been raised or targeted. “There will be a significant transformation in the way in which single family homes are owned and occupied in the United States,” Brownstein said in the letter. The strategy is to acquire homes through distressed sales and rent them out profitably, perhaps to the former owner, then “sometime in the not distant future, sell the houses and reap a profit from a recovery in prices.”
Brownstein Plans Funds To Buy, Rent Out Homes [Bloomberg Brief]
We want to invite you out for a night of drinking and yelling that we’re hosting alongside our bros at Above the Law. Join us on Feb 18th in NYC for an open bar and a short panel discussion featuring special guests! Think of it as a boozy safe space to defend your role in the destruction of America.
Take it away, Don Brownstein: “Before Copernicus, there was the view that earth stood still […]