suggestions
Nouriel Roubini Suggests Silvio Berlusconi Focus On The Underage Prostitutes Full-Time
By Bess Levin
While there are many people who work on Wall Street for reasons that have nothing to do with money (trading gives them a thrill, they enjoy analyzing companies, they love the hours, it’s what they believe they were put on this earth to do, etc), there exists at least a handful of individuals who got into this whole thing for one reason and one reason only: the cash. To those people and more, investor Jim Rogers has some advice: become a farmer. Perhaps you’re a first, second or third year investment banking analyst whose timing (re: when you graduated college but also dating back to when you were conceived) could not have been worse, for whom the year 2006 and the associated bonuses are but a dream. Perhaps you’re a seasoned veteran making great money who’s wanted to try something new but couldn’t think of an industry that could beat your current pay. Perhaps you’re employed by a hedge fund whose performance YTD is not inspiring confidence in this year’s bonus. Perhaps you’re a banker who wants to be compensated in cash and not company stock paid out over 14 years. Doesn’t matter if you’ve never done manual labor in your life, if you don’t know the first thing about milking anything, if you’re emotionally scarred from the one time you rode a tractor. If you wanna make some real money, start working your contacts on the farm. Continue reading »
People familiar with the firm say SAC Capital’s legal team actively discourages traders and analysts from using email, instant messages and other forms of communication that can leave a paper trail. The lack of email documentation at SAC Capital is something that has frustrated litigants over the years, according to people who have been involved in lawsuits and arbitrations with the fund. [Reuters, earlier]
ProPublica reports that JPMorgan is being investigated by the SEC to determine whether or not the bank adequately disclosed to investors that the securities that went into a CDO were selected by hedge fund Magnetar Capital, which was betting against the deal (JPMorgan apparently lost approximately $880 million on the deal and what’s more). Two problems seem apparent up front– one, unlike Goldman Sachs, whose CDO had the badass name of ABACUS, JPMorgan’s version is called “Squared.” And two, no one has said anything about the role of a Frenchman who describes himself as “fabulous” and writes gushy emails to his ex-girlfriend on the company dime. That’s not going to bode well for JPMorgan when it comes time for Congress to decide whether or not this thing is worthy of a hearing and/or Senator Carl Levin describing it as “shitty” 700 times on live TV. Given that everything on Wall Street is a competition, and JPMorgan is no poor man’s Goldman, I’m going to go ahead and tip off JD and Co as to the only way they’re going to be able to come out on top of this thing. If this woman’s involvement in the deal comes to light: Continue reading »
Who wants a nice ski lodge? Anybody interested in a place on the beach? Today’s your lucky day. Continue reading »
Back in February, Macquarie employee David Kiely got in a little hot water with his employer for looking at some topless shots of Miranda Kerr on his computer. It should’ve been no big deal but unfortunately his floor was being filmed on live TV at the time and as the Aussies couldn’t be perceived as condoning that sort of thing, they put him on a time-out. He was ultimately allowed to keep his job but management has taken extreme precautions to ensure something like this won’t happen again, namely equipping everyone’s computers with a child-lock. What’s a horny Aussie to do? Consider taking lunch at this establishment, where you can get you fix.
A WOMAN has stripped off naked in front of dozens of people having breakfast at a popular Darwin restaurant. Witnesses said the woman took off all her clothes after she and another woman had a full-on fist fight over a man yesterday. “That was just a shocker,” eyewitness Fernando Dentes, 34, said. “People were trying to eat.”
If so, might we suggest you tell whoever makes your travel arrangements to book you a flight on Colombia’s Aires airline, whose planes are protected by some sort of force field that allows them to struck by lightening, break into three pieces and only have one person (out of 131) die (and not as a direct result of the crash)? [WSJ]
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