When does the second quarter end? Why, June, of course. And when was Dov Charney fired as CEO of the company he founded? June. Therefore, Dov Charney is responsible for the fact that said company lost less money in the three months ended in June than it had in the year-earlier period, according to Dov Charney, who is also not interested in having it pointed out that he was also CEO during the aforementioned year-earlier period, or that he was fired not for being bad at running American Apparel’s finances (which he arguably was), but for being an alleged scumbag. Read more »

  • 23 Jun 2011 at 5:16 PM

Lenny Dykstra Will Not Go Down Without A Fight

[Twitter via CNBC, earlier]

  • 04 Jun 2010 at 11:34 AM

Barclays To Top Death Defying League Tables

On more than one occasion, Lloyd Blankfein has been forced to prove he can subsist for days without food, water or toilet. Steve Cohen had a brush with death a few years ago that left him with chronic back pain. Biff Basness has had several harrowing episodes during routine manscaping sessions. While lesser financial services employees would use these experiences as an excuse to give up, on life and/or making it rain, none of them threw in the towel. Despite, for example, having one ball that will never return to its original shape, these men went about their work, business as usual. And businesses didn’t just not suffer, it soared. Today we can add another survivor to that list. Another guy you can point to when your colleague whimpers about a mild case of carpal tunnel, or says he’s thinking about looking for a slower-paced gig following a horrific car accident. A guy like Thomas Wopat-Moreau. Read more »

Peter Nussbaum would like the record to reflect that this is just a costume Steve wears sometimes. He doesn’t *actually* look like this.

For the July issue of Vanity Fair, Bryan Burrough has the second only on the record interview with Steve Cohen. Burroughs previously hinted that he was able to seal the deal with Steve due to the fact that it would offer Cohen’s wife, Alex, a highly coveted opportunity to be shot by Annie Liebowitz. And sure, that probably helped things (the billionaire secretly loves having his photo taken, and in another life had dreams of being a male model). But beyond that, it’s clear that Steve and his people were ready for some Real Talk. Sick and tired they are of being seen as recluses who keep themselves ensconced in a hermetically-sealed full body condom. Sick and tired they are of having people assume that underneath their clothes, they’re entirely covered in scar tissue. Sick and tired they are of the whispers, the rumors, the theories, that they’re control freaks who will never let go. SICK AND TIRED THEY ARE OF THE ASSUMPTIONS THEY DON’T SAY PLEASE AND THANK YOU. Sick and tired they are of the nicknames. And so now, they’re opening up, like never before. ‘Cause they’ve got some things they’d like to clear up. A few things they want you to know, so you don’t just go making it all up on your own. Are you ready for this truth? This truth to be laid on your ass? Steve’s general counsel, Peter Nassbaum, will start.

* And it pertains to the photo above. “Steve has been characterized unfairly,” Peter A. Nussbaum, his general counsel says, “He doesn’t have two horns and a tail.” *** Read more »