that’s nice

  • 06 Feb 2013 at 4:43 PM

Ken Lewis’s Great Idea Pad Sells For $3.15 Million

They said it couldn’t be done. They said it didn’t matter if it was $4.5 million or $2.5 million or if they were giving it away. They said potentials buyers wouldn’t be swayed by the pitch to “sleep where Angelo Mozilo hath slept, after a few too many troughs of Boone’s farm” (AKA “The Mozilo Bedroom”), or to impress guests with the cocktail party fodder that “that chair you’re sitting in right now the very one Ken Lewis was sitting in when he decided to buy Merrill Lynch, can’t get better investing karma than that.” They said the vomit stains on the rug would not be a selling point. They were wrong. Read more »

Great news for anyone who’s been sitting nervously at their desk at Morgan Stanley the last few days, wondering whether or not their boss was about to tap them on the shoulder to go have a chat with HR: if you’ve made it this long, you’re safe! There will be no more human layoffs for the foreseeable future (plants may still be at risk). Read more »

  • 18 Dec 2012 at 1:44 PM

Promotion Watch ’12: Credit Suisse

Recent events might have had you thinking otherwise, but Credit Suisse does more than just layoff its employees– sometimes it promotes them, too! Earlier this morning, in fact, the Swiss bumped a whole bunch of guys and girls up to managing director. And even though it’s not grundle-to-face level exciting, it’s still something. Read more »

Rumors began to circulate late last year that Jefferies could be acquired by a large bank, something that would surely result in layoffs. “When banks buy other banks, people lose their jobs,” said Richard Lipstein, managing director at executive search firm Gilbert Tweed Associates. “If you look at a sale of an investment bank, this is as close to perfect as it gets.” Leucadia, often compared to Berkshire Hathaway for its diverse set of holdings, already owns a 28% stake in Jefferies, meaning it intimately knows the firm and its culture, and believes in its direction, Lipstein said…As for layoffs, “there likely won’t be any,” said one headhunter who works with Jefferies and requested anonymity. “Now they’ll have a stronger balance sheet, and the ability to pick up slack where other firms have left off,” said the recruiter. [eF, earlier]

But will he read select passages at Dealbreaker Dramatic Reading night? These are the questions that need answering. [Bloomberg TV]

Although not authorized to invest company cash in trades, Steve Perkins, a long standing, senior broker at PVM Oil Futures, had managed to spend $520 million on oil futures contracts throughout the night of June 30, 2009, the FSA said today. On the morning of the 30th, an admin clerk called Perkins to ask why he had bought 7 million barrels of crude during the night. Perkins had no recollection of the transactions, and it turned out that he had made the trades during a “drunken blackout,” according to the FSA. By the time PVM realized the transactions had not been authorized by a client, they had incurred losses of $9,763,252. Between the hours of 1:22 a.m. and 3:41 a.m., Perkins gradually bought 69 percent of the global market, while driving prices up from $71.40 to $73.05, by bidding higher each time. At 6:30 a.m., presumably sobering up and realizing what he’d done, he sent a message to his managing director claiming an unwell relative meant he would not be able to make it into work. Following an official investigation Perkins admitted to having a drink problem, had his trading license revoked for five years, and was given a fine of £72,000 ($116,878). The FSA has said that they will re-approve his license after the five-year period, if he has recovered from his drinking problem, although they warned that,“Mr Perkins poses an extreme risk to the market when drunk.” [CNBC, earlier]

  • 30 Aug 2012 at 4:12 PM

Bonus Watch ’13: LightSquared

Harbinger Capital-backed LightSquared is a wireless venture that seeks to create “convenient connectivity for all.” Unfortunately, as the Wilbur Falcone fans among us know, it’s looking like it’ll be a dark day in hell before that happens, on account of bunch of forces working together to shut this thing down at every turn, including but not limited to the yachting community that claims GSP interference caused by LS will result in boats getting lost at sea; the National Oceanic Atmospheric Administration, which has said LightSquared “may degrade precision services that track hurricanes, guide farmers and help build flood defenses”; and the FAA, which recently put out a study estimating LS could “cost 794 lives in aviation accidents over 10 years with disruptions to satellite-aided navigation.” Also not helping is the fact that LightSquared filed for bankruptcy in May, the company is blowing through cash faster than Wilbur’s Studio 54 days, and senior executives won’t stop quitting. While some people might take stock of the situation and decide, at this point, to throw in the towel, Wilbur Falcone’s benefactor is not some people. He’s making this thing work if it’s the last thing he does. So, what now? Obviously a couple of miracle workers are going to be needed and the thing about miracle workers is that they don’t come cheap. Gotta spend money to make money. Read more »