tick tock tick tock

Please note, this deal is only good through November. SAC must call 555-8959 in the next 53 days with a valid credit card number to take advantage of this special offer. As an added bonus, if SAC acts fast, the Feds will throw in a U.S. Attorney’s Office Limited Edition Fleece. Don’t let this opportunity pass you by. Read more »

  • 21 Feb 2013 at 12:56 PM

Bonus Watch ’13: UBS

…employees will get their bonus numbers when management feels like giving them their bonus numbers! Read more »

“We are one decision away from restoring our fiscal and moral authority from around the world,” Dimon said today. “Let’s just do it.” [Dealbook]

Yes, he said that he’ll stay ’til this thing gets done but FYI, he’s already booked a one-way ticket out of this dump and it’s nonrefundable, so if you think he’s gonna just stand by while you people fumble around and fuck everything up, thereby prolonging his stay in this asylum one day longer, think again! Read more »