His name was Dan Tuckfield, and though the police say that their investigation “did not find that there was anything suspicious about the way the man died,” he did show “signs of decomposition” by the time they found him, which was almost immediately, so the neighbors are suspicious. Obviously this is very sad, but if there’s any consolation to be had, it’s the comfort we can take in the fact that Tuckfield was the happiest possible conditions when he passed: he was in a Jacuzzi and he was naked. It doesn’t get much better than that (the only way it could is if he was literally surrounded by bacon, not just in spirit, or if his tongue constantly regenerating strip of bacon). Read more »
Oliver Stone has said it before and he’ll say it again: nobody was supposed to see Wall Street and think “Hey! I wanna do that, too.” And yet, for the last twenty odd years, you people and the people you work with have never failed to approach Stone or Michael Douglas when they’re out to dinner to tell them you went to work on the Street after being inspired by the 1987 flick, ruining their evenings. Idiots! You were supposed to see movie and say Gekko, bad. Prosecution of “values underpinning American capitalism,” good. See? Simple little equation. And yet. And yet. That all kind of went over your heads, didn’t it? If it makes you feel any better, you’re not alone. A much loved and sorely missed hedge fund manager didn’t get it either.