tips

Remember Donna Murdoch? Her story is a bit complicated but essentially: Murdoch and her husband were hard up for some money (they owed $1.45 million on a subprime home mortgage, natch). She decided the best way to tackle the debt was to make some money trading on material non-public information. Getting the tips was easy enough– Murdoch got on AshleyMadison.com where she met an Ernst and Young partner named James Gansman who advised companies doing mergers and was more than happy to give them to her. Only problem was, Big D didn’t have the cash to trade on Gansman’s inside info, so she hopped back on to the adultery site and found another guy who could front the money. That guy was 71 year-old Richard Hansen, who gave her a job at Keystone Equities Group (where he was chairman), plus some of his penis on the side.

Both Murdoch and Hansen traded on Gansman’s tips (neither guy knew about the other, by the by) and while all three faced years in prison, only the men are doing time, on account of Murdoch screwing them yet again. Read more »

  • 26 Jul 2011 at 9:49 AM

Let’s Talk About: CFA Results

Thirty-nine percent of Level 1 takers and forty-three percent of Level II’ers are likely feeling prettay prettay prettay good at the moment, possibly on account of celebratory morning drinks or the realization that the promise land is within reach. The rest of you are probably in not as great a place, on account of having just thrown away the last 4-6 months of your lives. Read more »

As you may have heard, a man attempted to hit Rupert Murdoch in the face with a pie during his hearing before Parliament this morning. It’s unclear what sort of cream the pastry contained (custard, whipped, shaving, man, cow), but apparently some of it “spattered Murdoch,” and the proceedings were adjourned for 10 minutes. The pie-thrower was immediately taken into custody, which probably came as relief as it meant that Rupert’s wife Wendi couldn’t finish him off. Read more »

  • 05 Jul 2011 at 4:15 PM

CNBC Wants To Help Cure Your Hangover

Not feeling so hot today? Kind of wishing it wasn’t frowned upon to catch a few winks under your desk or curled up in the stall of the men’s room? Vowing to never again consume the amount of alcohol you did over the past three days, so help you god? CNBC knows it’s not possible for you to lay off the sauce for more than 12 hours but if you’re willing to get real for 1 sec, would like to help. On Worldwide Exchange this morning guest Tina Hedges recommended “prevention” as the best cure for a hangover, which comes in the form of a drink she suggests downing before alcohol called “Mercy,” marketed and sold by her firm. Mercy apparently works its magic through “a propriety blend of amino acids, vitamins and minerals” and is available online. If that doesn’t sound like something you’d be interested, CNBC’s John Carney, who anchor Nicole Lapin billed as “our resident expert of sorts” when it comes to hangovers, offered his his 5-Step Cure, which are as follows: Read more »

You might think that hygiene habits should be a personal decision left to each staff member’s own discretion, but Cohen said that the reach of bad body odor goes beyond the cubicle around you. “It’s engaging in anti-social behavior,” he said. “Not bathing, being unkempt… You have to be very careful, especially if you’re in a client-interfacing role.”… [Additionally] No matter how much you hate your boss or how dumb you think he is, it’s usually career suicide to reveal those sentiments to a higher-up… [And] No one likes a freeloader. If you are the worker who never presents an original thought at work, or you take credit for others’ accomplishments, you’re likely to find yourself out the door. [FINS]

Thinking about tweeting pictures of your package to some college chicks? Head of a public company whose board might take issue with the shots and try and force you out? If you want to keep your job, schedule a meeting (10 days after you get caught) and take several pages from Congressman Anthony Weiner’s playabook. Read more »

Gorman

So you’ve started a hedge fund and have decided the best way to maximize returns for investors is by trading on material non-public information. With the government’s crackdown on insider trading, odds are you will ultimately get caught and, if you’ve suffered blunt trauma to the head, will decide to take your chances at a trial by jury rather than settle. If you’d like some level of assurance you’ll have better odds than Raj Rajaratnam, who was deemed guilty by Day 2 of deliberations (despite the jury taking 12 days to spit it out), consider these tips from one of the women, Leila Gonzalez Gorman, who helped sent him away. Read more »