Remember when Council of Economic Advisers chairman Austan Goolsbee explained the Bush tax cuts debate on a whiteboard? Bloomberg does. The normally staid, restrained, non-confrontational network brought it up today in a segment that one might rate “3 trombones” on the “how many sad trombones for Goolsbee does this rate” scale. Continue reading »
whiteboard markers
Based on a pretty kick-ass performance in July, just gonna throw it out there: maybe whiteboard markers aren’t such a bad idea after all? Continue reading »
You bitches don't know from sexual harassment.
Apparently the answer is yes. Whether or not your boss doing things to you with whiteboard markers is a new occurrence or you were just scared to come forward and the financial crisis for some reason gave you the courage is unclear.
Since the start of the recession, a growing number of sexual harassment complaints have come from men. Some 16.4% of all sexual harassment claims—or 2,094 claims—were filed by men in fiscal 2009, up from 15.4%, or 1,869 claims, in fiscal 2006, according to the U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission.
Does everyone go with the golden shower/choking you out/nicknaming you “stupid girl” model? Not really. That’s pretty much reserved for the pros. Most of you are getting you simply having your taints grazed while messing around on the desk (I’m not saying that makes it okay or trying to minimize it but I am saying: amatuer hour. Miss).
While male victims sometimes experience behavior like groping and unwanted sexual advances, employment lawyers say increasingly “locker room” type behavior like vulgar talk and horseplay with sexual connotations have been the subject of claims.
Recession Spurs Sexual Harassment Claims By Men [WSJ via Daily Intel]
Ping (Jiang) Capital Down 4.96 Percent For January, Ping Jiang Interested In Meeting With *You* Today
By Bess Levin
Ping Jiang, maestro of the whiteboard marker, was fired from SAC Capital in March 2008, (not because of the push-up bras but due to poor performance). He branched out on his own soon thereafter but we’d heard nary a peep since then re: returns or whether or not he was making employees sew their own dresses. No word on the latter yet (speak up, young seamstresses!) but– and I bite my tongue saying this– I’m slightly worried about how the team will be able to cover the costs associated with new “office supplies,” after ending January down nearly 5 percent. Granted, this may have been a blip, following a stellar 2009, when the fund was up 192.81%, presumably thanks to the official implementation of PJ’s trading philosophy (no more hiding it behind closed doors). And while we’re on the subject– it seems as though Jiang is keeping it in the family, having hired brother (?) Justin as a manager, which as an interesting twist to the BJ for trade approval model. Finally, the most important news! The team is looking for investors for a new fund, Ping Emerging Markets Macro, and would love to get your ass in to meet Mr. J today– get a piece of this while it’s still hot.
From: [redacted]
To: [redacted]
Subject: Ping Emerging Markets Macro Fund
Dear [redacted],
Ping Capital Management Ltd was founded by Ping Jiang and partners in March 2008. Ping Jiang splits his time between a research office based in Shanghai and a trading and operations office in New York. Ping Jiang is currently in New York and would like to meet with interested investors to discuss their current fund, Ping Exceptional Value Fund, and a new fund, Ping Emerging Markets Macro Fund, that is expected to launch H1 2010. Short biographies for Ping and the partners are attached.
The Ping Exceptional Value Fund is a Latin American- and Asian-focused macro strategy that combines quantitative micro analysis with discretionary macro analysis and trading. The Fund trades across two different time frames; long-term concentrated value investments in themes that are determined to be extremely undervalued and short-term
active trading around the core themes.
The Ping Emerging Markets Macro Fund will use the same research process as the flagship fund but will have a more significant focus on the short term trading element.
Please let us know if you would like to arrange a meeting, schedule a call or would like to receive any additional information from the manager.
So I just got back from the courthouse and I brought with me Andrew Tong’s psychiatric evaluation, which goes into a little more detail than the filing posted earlier. For instance, what was the object inserted in Tong’s ass by Jiang? Whiteboard marker. What else was Jiang doing to him at the time? Choking him. Why was PJ doing all this? Andrew had come to him and said he was no longer able to get an erection, on account of the birth control pills (his wife’s) that he was taking. So Jiang wanted to demonstrate to Andrew that he could, in fact, get wood (which he did during that particular instance). Before Jiang peed in Tong’s mouth, did he slap Tong around a little bit? Yes. How did the first blow job for trade approval go? Not too well. Tong ended up getting physically ill halfway through. Ping let him stop, however, “Mr. Jiang did not allow the trade as the requested fellatio was not completed” (this is not ‘Nam, there are rules). A few weeks later, Tong “agreed to perform fellatio to Mr. Jiang’s satisfaction. Mr. Jiang then allowed Mr. Tong’s trade to go through.”
On another note: in all seriousness, reading through all this, I actually feel bad for SAC and Steve. This does not come off as workplace sexual harassment but rather a workplace affair between two aberrant fetishists, playing out their S&M/water-sports fantasies, which, unfortunately for SAC, took place at the office. As someone pointed out early, nobody pisses in your mouth without your complicity.
