• Toys

    China: You let us date-rape your children, we’ll maintain our US currency reserves

    On the Cusp of Holidays, More Toy Recalls [Portfolio]

    / Nov 8, 2007 at 3:38 PM
  • China, Really take a second to think about this, Toys

    Want To Ensure Your Kid Won’t Die? It’ll Cost Ya.

    You say you want to be able to buy Barbie dolls for your son without worrying that he’s going to get lead poisoning but at what cost? Toy manufacturers hoping to call parents on their collective bluff—and really actually kind of baiting them to do so—today announced that they will be complying with safety standards […]

    / Oct 9, 2007 at 4:45 PM
  • Jews (or lack thereof), Toys

    Mattel Exec Tries Hand At Judaism, But Foreskin Still Shows

    In honor of the upcoming holiday, Mattel’s executive vice president, Thomas Debrowski, issue an apology to China on behalf of Mattel, for a massive number of recalls on toys following the revelation that some had contained excessive levels of lead paint. “Mattel takes full responsibility for these recalls and apologizes personally to you, the Chinese […]

    / Sep 21, 2007 at 3:20 PM
  • Toys

    Mattel: A Few Kids Will Combust While Using Our Products

    Mattel’s special way of dealing with safety concerns (blaming China, your lead-hungry children) has brought increased scrutiny on the company’s recall record. If your children avoided lead poisoning from Mattel products, another hazard they might have to contend with is spontaneous combustion. Children bursting into flames used to be so simple – take the rollerblading […]

    / Sep 4, 2007 at 10:56 AM
  • Toys

    Mi Picasso Es Su Picasso

    Normally, the answer to the semi-annual “who anonymously bought the astronomically expensive Picasso?” question would be “Steve Wynn.” But not this time. Picasso’s Dora Maar with Cat went to a man described by the Times as being in his late 40s, inexperienced at buying art at auction and “possibly Russian.” And that’s not the only […]

    / May 4, 2006 at 11:40 AM
  • Toys

    Maximize Productivity (And Returns!) with… The Treadputer™

    If lunch is for wimps, then so is working out while failing to make money. Enter Brad Feld, venture capitalist and inventor of the “Treadputer,” below: Those are standard flat screens, but we’re pretty sure you could bolt three Bloomberg terminals onto that baby and be off and running (so to speak). We’ve been speculating […]

    / Apr 18, 2006 at 10:27 AM

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