Backdating. Pretexting. The excuse is always the same—everyone else was doing it. (Or “Larry Sonsini said it was okay.”) And it’s lame. And Warren Buffett has had enough of it.

The “Sage of Omaha” warns that poor corporate governance cannot be forgiven just because the practice is widespread. “The five most dangerous words in business may be ‘everybody else is doing it’,” wrote Mr Buffett, who has long been sceptical of stock options as a means of remunerating executives.

Buffett orders crackdown on unethical practices [FT on MSNBC via W$F]

Would you feel good or bad if you bought a used car for several hundred times its blue book value? Of course, when the car you buy belongs to Warren Buffett, you aren’t just buying a car. You’re buying access to the oracle of Omaha. And what is that access worth? Well, the market value is about sixty grand—the amount Learning Annex chief Bill Zander paid for Warren Buffett’s towncar less the value of the car.
And what did Zander get out of the deal? Apparently, he got the chance to pitch to Buffett the opportunity to give a Learning Annex lecture. Even better, Buffett said yes, according to an item on yesterday’s New York Post Page Six. The money paid to Buffett for giving the lecture will go to charity, of course. How else is he going to keep it from somehow getting into the hands of pesky tax-collectors and grandchildren?

Buffett Drives A Hard Bargain [New York Post]

Warren Buffett is in Israel now, touring the facilities of Iscar Ltd., the metal-cutting tools company his investment company acquired for $4 billion two-and-a-half months ago. The company is located near the Lebanese border and was briefly shuttered during the recent outbreak of warfare there.
Buffett has reserved the entire King David Hotel in Jerusalem for his entourage. It certainly sounds grand but according to some recent visitors it is less than kingly. As the blog Hotelchatter explains:

Will the King David Hotel be ready to serve an American billionaire and his entourage? Based on the hotel’s track record the chances of this are slim to none. The hotel staff has been painted as one horrible picture by many recent past guests. On top of that, many find the hotel in desperate need of renovations and better food. None of this is hard to believe since the royal suite is shamelessly boasting a VCR. Who is Buffet’s booking agent anyway?

But this might be unfair. The hotel’s “roytal suite” boasts a “VCR and FAX.” It doesn’t really get much better than that. Oh, wait, it does. He’s got a “jacuzzi bath” in his suite.
This probably makes DealBreaker’s infamous inquiry into whether Warren Buffett is going to hell a bit outdated. He may already be there.

Warren Buffet Likes Outdated Hotel Suites [HotelChatter.com]

So after our last post we were wondering what Nicole could have done to provoke grandpa Warren’s wrath. It’s always possible, we thought, that she’s some sort of kooky chick with parent/grandparent issues who is dragging her family’s name through the mud.
But guess what? She’s not. She looks a bit crunchy—but then she’s an artist in San Francisco so those dreadlocks are probably some sort of mandatory dress code. We’ll even go so far as to admit we find her rather fetching. What’s more she sounds intelligent, well-adjusted, down-to-earth and downright sweet.
Here’s a link to the Oprah video. And here’s one of her talking to an NPR reporter after grandpa announced he was giving away his money.

Warren Buffett may not want to pass his fortune on to his family when he shuffles off his mortal coil and greets whatever fate awaits him in the afterlife, but while he’s alive he certainly wants to keep a tight reign on the lives of his family members. At least, that’s what his recent declaration disowning his granddaughter seems to imply.
As Page Six reports, in a letter to San Francisco artist Nicole Buffett, Warren wrote, “I have not emotionally or legally adopted you as a grandchild, nor have the rest of my family adopted you as a niece or a cousin.”
When asked for comment, a Warren representative went even harsher.

“Nicole is not Mr. Buffett’s granddaughter. She is the daughter of a former daughter-in-law of his who was married to his son for only about 10 years.”

So what got Nicole voted off Buffett Island? She participated in a follow-up to Jamie Johnson’s “Born Rich” about the lives of young people raised in wealthy families, and then went on Oprah to talk about it.
But Warren’s wrong, at least legally. Nobody chooses their parents but you also don’t get to choose your grandchildren. When your kids adopt, those adoptees become part of your family and potential heirs. When she was quite young, her mother married Warren Buffett’s son Peter, and Peter formally adopted her. If Warren, his wife and his immediate children died without a valid will, the estate laws of most states would give her whatever part of his fortune remained.
Buffet to Kin: You’re Fired! [Page Six; hattip: WallStFolly]

So it seems that our gift wasn’t enough for Warren. Yesterday he decided to make an honest woman of long-time girl friend Astrid Menks. Of course, Warren didn’t spring for a nice ceremony—the whole affair took 15 minutes, was held at his daughter’s house and apparently no one was invited. Even worse—no honeymoon.
Well done, Astrid. You’ve just married the world’s wealthiest cheapskate. Scrooge McDuck call your office.

Warren Buffett remarries – reports [Reuters]

Despite what many in the business media seem to believe, Warren Buffett did not spring fully formed from the mind of Zeus. He too was born of woman and today the old guy celebrates his 76th birthday. As a gift to him, for the rest of the day we’re not going to use phrases like “tax avoidance” or “hypocrisy” or even “going to hell.”
Because we know those words make you think of Warren in a bad light.
[DealBreaker's Warren Buffett Archive]