Planespotting: Dramaturgical Ménage à Trois, Milwaukee's Best, A War With Canada?

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Brad Pitt’s been looking himself in the mirror a lot lately* and saying “When in Rome.” The actor, 42 and starting to get something of a gut, who was until last year known for his love of architecture, poetry, and a glass of scotch, has been adopting the “do good” habits of his home-wrecking-there’s-a-pink-elephant-in-the-room & it’s-the-fact-that-you-used-to-wear-a-vial-of-Billy-Bob- Thorton’s-blood-around-your-neck girlfriend. Bradsky, or Whipping-boy, My Whipping-boy, as Angelina likes to call him, recently flew down to New Orleans to check in with Global Green USA, a new architectural project that is hoping to help the environment by saving energy. Namibian orphans it’s not, but the old boy’s got to walk before he can run. Hoping to prove to Angela that he’s worthy enough to pick up her kids from daycare—in a “We’re not worthy! We’re not worthy!” sort of way—Brady-boy appeared on the Today Show to garner some support for the cause by discussing his findings. After making some elucidatory points—“It’s bad down there”; “It’s really wet and stuff”—Pitt went on to talk about how freaking kick-ass Shiloh Nouvel—his only tangible link to Angelina—has turned out to be. “Having kids is really the most extraordinary thing I’ve ever taken on,” the Oklahoma-native proclaimed. “Man, I got kids now. And it really changes your perspective on the world. [You got a pet, you got a responsibility. If your dog is lost you don’t look for an hour then all it quits. You get your ass out there and you find that fucking dog.]” BP, who’s thisclose to becoming a fully licensed pilot like the Jol-ster, also noted that “Man, if I can get a burp out of that [baby], that little thing, I’ll feel such a sense of accomplishment,” which is a fair enough statement if you’ve ever seen Meet Joe Black or The Mexican. We feel like it’s only logical to assume that Mr. P then said to interviewer Ann Curry, “Shoes; that’s a funny word. Shoooooes.”


In other news of the Planespotting variety***, Leonore Annenberg packed up the Cessna 560 and headed to Milwaukee, Wisconsin some three days back. Why anyone would go to the Cheese Capital of the World we have no idea, but God knows the girl loves herself a cold six-pack of The Beast.
Tangentially, the CIA took its Gulfstream V for a ride to Muskoka, Ontario, to ostensibly lay the groundwork for a new war in 2007, which, incidentally, is part of their exit strategy for Iraq: There Must Be Some Way Out Of Here, Oh Wait, We’ve Got It, There’s a War to Fight in Canada.
Additionally, Oprah jaunted over to Santa Barbara, this past Friday. And just to reiterate, she’s not gay. Though the trip may or may not have been with erstwhile lover, Gayle King. And therein lies your answer, friends.
Finally, Michael Moritz and his Gulfstream IV are scheduled to arrive in Cincinnati, Ohio, later this afternoon. Obviously, you're asking yourselves the proverbial "Why would anyone in their right mind ever go to Cincinnati?" and we want to help you, we really do, but it's just a ridiculously hot, oppresive day, so do us a favor and see "Why would anyone go to the Cheese Capital of the World?" and substitute "He or she would probably have to be on some sort of sedative" and "the guy loves himself some good buckeyes" in the appropriate fields.
*Or, you know, more often than usual.
**Spotted in an unconfirmed way, that is.
***And you know what kind of news that is. The fantastic, edge-of-your-seat kind, that you can't live without. (And also the unconfirmed-ish kind).

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