Skip to main content

Liquid Lunch: Carly Fiorina Discusses Tough Choices With Sir Harold Evans At Le Cirque

  • Author:
  • Updated:
    Original:

hosted by the venerable Week

Let’s just cut to the chase—I’m in love with Harold Evans. And had I been given more than 20 minutes’ notice that I was going to be in his delicious presence, I might have stood out among the suits in more of a tastefully displayed cleavage way and in less of a “I shop at American Apparel" way.
Evans begins to read a passage from the book about the board telling everyone that Fiorina’s leaving because of “personal reasons, to spend more time with her family,” etc, and then gives the audience what I swear to God is a come hither look and paraphrases with, “basically a bunch of bull shit.” I’m sitting within maybe 10 inches of him, and if I thought it wouldn’t distract the audience from the conversation at hand, I would reach over, place a hand on his forearm and mouth, “I love you.”
Fiorina waxes on about the H-P takeover of Compaq for about six minutes; very articulate and all but you’d have to have a really deep interest in H-P and/or Compaq to not start hearing “If you like pina coladas…gettin’ caught in the rain…if you’re not into yoga…if you have half a brain” 90 seconds in. Evans interjects—“I’ve been involved in some takeovers myself; mostly on the receiving end.” I laugh and toss my hair over my shoulder—he knows what that means.


When she was first promoted to an executive-level position, Fiorina was told she couldn’t go to a meeting with her boss and some clients because said it was at The Boardroom, a restaurant where the waitresses “wear see-through baby doll dresses and dance on the tables,” as the site of the get-together. But she went anyway, and the next day, her boss felt like a douche bag. Not unlike my first DealBreaker sit-down with John and a guy from Lehman Brothers (except for the fact that John didn’t have any morning-after feelings of douchey-ness, and it took place at Scores).
Fiorina self-deprecatingly notes that she “was a medieval history major and a law school dropout with no reason to be hired by anyone.” Evans asks her if she ever used the teachings of Machiavelli while governing at H-P. “I thought a lot about ‘there is nothing more difficult and dangerous, or more doubtful of success, than an attempt to introduce a new order of things’,” she offers, earning her keep. Evans one ups her with a Mach. quote about “killing your enemies,” to much laughter. I try to blink him a message—“Let’s get out of here,” but the damn waiter steps in between us and ruins everything.
During the Q&A portion of the show, someone asks Fiorina if she’ll consider sending a copy of Tough Choices to “Ms. Pirro.” “Ooo, burn,” I think to myself, and am surprised when Fiorina starts talking about what a great woman “Pirro” is and several audience members cheer and get up and applauded. But then I realize it was “Pelosi.” So that clears things up a bit (but I still don’t think it was necessarily something to “raise the roof” over. Suggest sending it to Patty Dunn or something a little more catfight-worthy, next time. That, at least, I can respect).
Dessert’s served and I need to get back to the office, as Carney and I are in the midst of a best-of-seven badminton tournament. (My educated guess is that) Tough Choices is a great read that you should probably go out and buy right quickly. Myself, I got a free copy, which was fortuitous, because I’ve got bigger fish to fry, those fish being how I can get an internship or the like with Sir Harold. If anyone hears of anything, you know where to find me.

Related

Carly Fiorina Suspends Campaign, Will Remain Unemployed

Fiorina supporters can now show their support by endorsing Carly on LinkedIn.

Cruz.Fiorina

Ted Cruz Joining Forces With Famed Merger Expert Carly Fiorina

Carly Fiorina is up for another job she'll never get.

Carly Fiorina Is Very Unafraid of Chinese Entrepreneurs

One might even say that she's offensively dismissive of the Chinese economy in general.