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Do's And Don'ts, For Partying Neophytes

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Forbes, which, little known fact, is actually an off-shoot of the Emily Post Institute, offers a handy how-to guide today, per attending holiday parties. And by handy we mean handy for people who either a. are the human equivalent of watching paint dry (no flirting! "This is a no-flirting zone. It risks being construed as sexual harassment. Besides, it's just creepy") or b. have never actually attended a party ("Attend other parties. If you're invited to another party, go"). What's also interesting is that, aside from Forbes' obvious attempt to be a total buzz-kill ("Enjoy a drink or two, not 12"), the list of Do's and Don'ts seem to have required no research, akin to helpful hints on dating: "meet men," "shower," "show up when you have a date." And speaking of parties, don't forget about us! If you can top the invite to dinner at a Deutsche Bank's managing partner's home in Westchester, the drinks are on us, provided there's an open bar. (Also, rest assured, we do not subscribe to ANY of Forbes' commandements).
Office Party Do's and Don'ts [Forbes]