Your Daily Answers

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The synapse raping website Yahoo! Personal Finance finally updated its Top 5 Questions & Answers feature, in which perky little animated Yahoovatars ask questions that probe deep into the soul, or sometimes even the isle, of man. Once again, the existing answers are inadequate, so here are DealBreaker’s answers to the current Top 5 (click here for prior Yahoo! Q&A):
Q: What’s the easiest way for a college student to establish credit?
A: Fill your college course load with classes that have the most ridiculous titles in the course catalogue, like Animals that Talk, Construction of the Samurai, Magic of Numbers, Cosmic Connections, Soundscapes: World Music or the Emergence of Modern Scandinavia (I took 5 of these 6 and I graduated, no problem). Also take any class with a clever nickname like Rocks for Jocks (Geology), Heroes for Zeroes (Folklore & Mythology Class), Prose for Ho’s (Poetry), Physical Kinesiology for Running Backs or Multivariable Planar Geometry For Poets.
Q: What are the best estate planning tools for a newly married couple?
A: A few mirrored panels on non-obvious surfaces or a vibrating love seat shaped like a human mouth are welcome fixtures in the estate of any newly married couple, especially if they can afford an estate.
Q: How do I start a trust fund?
A: Marry someone named Jessica Tisch or Diana Townsend-Butterworth. If you can’t determine a potential “acquisition’s” net worth that overtly, graph the number of friends they have vs. their natural charisma. Answers will emerge.
Q: What should the content of a Cover Letter include?
A: Mostly pulp.
Q: What should I know about rent to own?
A: It’s a phrase used by huge tools and one of the surest ways to end most forms of social interaction.
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