Art Imitates Life: HBO HF TV


Thought about HBO’s new show about hedge funds (working title: Sextourage, although, in all seriousness, they should call it Arbitrage), lately? As in, are you going to watch it because there’s nothing else on but will hate yourself the whole time because it’ll probably be completely unrealistic and not know its longs from its shorts? (We did kind of like TBS' first original series "Bull," by the way, but only because we love when Donald Moffat plays evil characters). Now’s your chance to do something about it. The show’s creator, Doug Ellin, will be on BlogTalkRadio from 10-11 this morning (click here to listen) and would love for you to call in (347-677-0649) with some soft-ball questions. Don’t do that. Don’t play that game. Here are some starters, we know you can do better:
-Who are the following: Brian Hunter, Tom Hudson, Jim Chanos and Dan Loeb
-What are the following: Global Alpha, Amaranth, Fortress, Chapman, Third Point
-How many of your characters will be quants?
- Will they use the phrase "get it done?"
- Why not?
-Will the funds be long only, volatility-shorting, event-driven or multi-strategy?
-Who will be the token gerbil?
- Will any of the characters make love to a towel?
- Will underage girls be present?
- Why not?
- Will the fish picture be in one of the character's offices?
- Whose daughter will drive the car into the swimming pool?
- Will you rip up real old-masters paintings?
- Why not?
- Who will play the SEC chairman?
- Not Sam Antar, former Crazy Eddie CEO and convicted felon?
- Why not?
- Do you read DealBreaker? (Ok, this might be self-serving for us, but do it anyway, yes?)
- Who is Muffie Benson-Perella?
- What is delta-gamma approximation?
- Ok, well then, what's vega, smart-ass?
- No, NOT the star, you idiot. Did you hear a capital letter in my sentence?
- WRONG it is sensitivity to the IMPLIED volatility of the underlier. Sheesh.
- Will any of the funds use a 130/30 strategy?
- Why not?
- Will Michael Douglas make any appearances?
- Why not?
- How about a recurring crazy cab driver character who is constantly worried that a blow-up would drain his Greenwich to JFK high-revenue customers from.... hello? Hello?
Call (/listen) NOW!


The Art Of The Farewell

Not everyone gets to write a New York Times Op-Ed when they quit their job, however disaffected. It’s also easier to quit a job after twelve years of cashing investment banking paychecks. No matter how “morally bankrupt” Goldman Sachs is, Greg Smith isn’t giving his bonuses back. Unlike Smith, who quit his job on his own terms and got to publish most of his resume in the Times, most of corporate America isn’t as lucky – and almost everyone in corporate America really wants to quit their job. So what are you supposed to do if you can’t get any above-the-fold space in a major newspaper? You have to burn bridges the old fashioned way – by writing a farewell email.