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Great Moments In Financial History: Google's Disappointing IPO

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Sunday is the 3 year anniversary of the Google IPO, which means that it's been three years since you blurted out "I told you guys, it didn't open anywhere near $100. Short that shit and you're printing money."
A 480% three-year return on GOOG later. Whoops.
It's not to say that you haven't been on your game at all in the past 3 years. Kicking around some tech stock ideas you did utter the wisdom, "But hey, iPods are cool. It's like everyone has one of those things. Clearly that market dominance is already priced into Apple's stock. Just wait until Microsoft gets into the market. I'm telling you, short Apple and you're printing money." A 640% three-year return on AAPL since August 2004 and you blew it again.
Ok, ok, we won't forget your one triumph, which trumps all your other misses. You noticed that the only banker chicks who haven't gained the "Seamless 15" eat only NutriSystem bars and are constantly going to the bathroom to either cry or throw them up. This netted you a ridiculous 3,000% return on NTRI, which you bought in August 2004 after that one hot summer managed to not blow up after 8 weeks. Maintaining eye candy on the floor was something you were more than ready to invest in, not to mention put your mouth where your money was going.
Google's Historic IPO Run: Beatable [BusinessWeek via DealBook]