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Bernanke Agrees

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The whole mortgage meltdown situation—don’t much get it, don’t much care. Per usual, we’re not really interested in delving a lot further than “Who’s to Blame?” but apparently, we can’t even do that right. Previously, we (in cahoots with Bear Stearns, who’s always in cahoots with someone) had sent singing telegrams dripping with vitriol and pipe bombs to the poor and Alan Greenspan. Over the weekend, we found out that represented a grave error in judgment on our part (conveniently, we—meaning me—were able to atone for our misguided sins against the country’s underprivileged/that crazy old guy. Carney, having no such get out of jail free card, will be going to hell).
As a guest on Rupert Murdoch’s “Forbes on Fox,” Richard Karlgaard, publisher of the magazine, was asked by host David Asman “what’s the deal” with home foreclosures, the economy, etc. His response, if you’re not Jerry Falwell taking part in this dialogue from the grave, may surprise you:

Well, what I think is that we're seeing the first generation of home buyers who, in school, were taught to put condoms on bananas instead of learning about compound interest. This is not a good thing, but, ah, we have to work our way through it and the only way the market can clear, as Neal [Neal Weinberg, a senior editor at Forbes] said, is for the foreclosures to happen.

Other horrible events you can trace back to schools teaching kids to put condoms on bananas include but are certainly not limited to: 9/11, the theory of evolution and Global Alpha’s disastrous August (which actually hinted toward Sex Ed. being to blame in an earlier version of its letter to the investors).
Incidentally, if this was meant to be a preview for what we can expect from the Fox Business Network, color us excited. High school health classes have been getting a pass for TOO LONG.
The Publisher of Forbes Magazine, a Regular on Fox, Blames the Mortgage Meltdown on Sex Ed [News Hounds]