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Jeffrey Epstein Accuser Attempting To Get It Right Second Time Around

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In the grand tradition of trying to turn the (real or imaginary) sexual assault you suffered at the hands of a creepy old guy into stocks and bonds, everyone knows you don’t start at the top of the food chain. You get a few starter suits under your belt first, THEN you go to the top. Got to walk before you can run, got to allege “he put his hand on my knee and I didn’t like it” before you allege “he jerked off into a towel while I stood there awkwardly, and I think there might’ve been a purple vibrator in there, too” (those are just for instances).
A few years ago, Maximilia née Maximilian Cordero filed a $10 million lawsuit that accused her former lawyer, Glen Gentile, of statutory rape and endangering the welfare of a minor 2002, when she was “under the age of 17” (representing Cordero was her new—at the time—boyfriend/attorney, William Unroch). Unfortunately, the case got thrown out when the court informed Cordero (yes, it informed her) that in 2002, she was over the age of 17, and, actually almost 19. (For her part, Cordero said that she was “shocked” to find out how old she was.)
Not that anyone asked, but we blame Unroch in this situation, as he was probably receiving some sort of compensation to get this shit right. Cordero probably should’ve sacked her counsel then and there, but things get sticky when your lawyer’s also your boyfriend. Mercifully, this time, someone, presumably a third party, did the math, and placed Cordero’s repeated visits to Jeffrey Epstein’s house of perversion in their proper under-17 years-old place of 2000. Thank god, because otherwise, this whole thing might’ve come off as disingenuous. Anyway, enough of this inanity—where the hell is Loch Ness? No more on this case* ‘til we’ve heard her story.
S(h)e Has A History
*I kid-- we'd sooner stop writing about Tim Sykes.