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(Seemingly) Great News For Slacker CEOs And People Who Are Embarrassed By How Much They Suck At Golf

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Starting January 1, the U.S. Golf Association’s Golf Handicap Information Network will stop displaying complete scoring records, course locations and dates of rounds played for public consumption and ridicule. Unfortunately, they didn’t take into account the HUGE following Dealbreaker has among caddies, who’ve already promised to take and pass on copious notes regarding who routinely breaks triple digits (on his best days: Blankfein) and who calls the black cads “boy” (surprisingly: O’Neal)*. Nice try, USGA.
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*I'm supposed to inform that these examples of espionage, as far as we know, are made up. Why, what have you heard?