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UBS: We Have Zero Dollars. It Is Time For A Lavish Party.

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One of the reasons we love the Swiss is that they live beyond their means, without apology. While some of the other banks negatively affected by subprime, someone's drug problem, etc. are scaling back their holiday parties (for instance, Bear is holding its main event at the Sizzler and the plan is to skip out check), UBS is saying "$10 billion and counting writedown be damned, 2007's winter solstice shall be the grandest of them all." This year's wealth management funfest will begin at 7 pm on the evening of the 17th at the Museum of Natural History. Now, I know some of you want to say, "Well, 2006's party was at Rockefeller Center so, relatively speaking, this is a downgrade," but you're wrong. Whale beats tree. It's that simple. Upgrade. (UBS's IBD get together is tonight at 583 Park, which isn't a bad venue for a unit maybe worth negative 22 billion dollars.)