Skip to main content

Don't Act Like You Weren't Begging For It

Blackstone closed yesterday below $20. Right this second, it's at $18.45. I bet a lot of you are saying to yourselves, "Yeah, and? No big d." That's because you're one dimensional thinkers. This is a big d, for four* reasons. 1. Blackstone IPO looks more and more like the physical manifestation of the top tick on the private equity bubble. 2. The Chinese, pissed at buying 8.7 percent of this garbage, now have yet another reason for an arms race with the U.S. 3. It means the follow-up to the bukkake party of IPOs was a bust, and all those yelling "Buy shares on my face! Buy shares on my face!" last spring are now suffering from PCD (that's Post Coital Depression** to those who, I have no idea why, don't know). 4. CRAB HANDS, THE GRAPHIC.
Blackstone shares drops below $20 [Reuters]
*The first three don't really count, I just like the build-up.
**NB: That's a Hahn-ism you're reading right there.



You Mortals Weren't Ready For JPMorgan's Marko Kolanovic - And Marko Wasn't Ready For You Mortals

You know what? I'm not sure you people are emotionally stable enough to be trusted with Marko Kolanovic notes anymore.


Qatari Investors Still Like Deutsche Bank But They Don't "Like Like" It

The Qataris would piss on Deutsche Bank if it was on fire...but not enough to put out the flames.