Art Cock, Sans Smock (Last Night On Fox)

Author:
Updated:
Original:

It’s times like these we really regret not being able to get it together to start TiVo’ing Fox Business. Last night they had on Tim Patch, an Australian artist who uses his penis as a brush, to discuss his craft. There’s no video to be found, which is so typical of the network in that it often chooses not to save segments that could be construed as embarrassing (last week’s interview with an M&M, Tim Sykes’s appearance last night on “Happy Hour”), an obvious blow to posterity. All that remains is this screen shot (click to enlarge) a watchful reader (Stan O’Neal) was good enough to grab and send our way. The best part (and there are many to choose from) is the ticker tape at the bottom. This isn’t just some guy dipping his genitalia in oil and smearing it across a canvas—it’s the BUSINESS of some guy dipping his genitalia in oil and smearing it across a canvas. On that note, Patch (professional handle: “Pricasso”) is a businessman and businessmen can be bought—what I’m getting at is that we’ve commissioned a piece (art lover Ken Griffin agreed to float us the funds). The only question that remains is, who shall the subject be? Carney wants Bill Ackman, while I think a portrait of Meredith Whitney and her WWF husband would just be lovely. Your pick? Really think about it. This is important.

Related

Jeffrey Gundlach Had A Little Party Last Night

December 7, 1941. November 22, 1963. December 4, 2009. All dates of such historical and cultural significance that if you asked someone where they were that day, they'd surely be able to tell you. Because they weren't just any old days; they were moments when everything changed. The bombing of Pearl Harbor; the assassination of JFK; and, perhaps most importantly, the firing of Jeffrey Gundlach from the TWC Group, which had taken issue with his decision to start his own firm, and choose to express that anger by first escorting him out of the building and second raiding his offices, where they found an amount of adult films and sexual devices that suggested Gundlach was operating an online wholesale sex shop distributor and keeping the inventory at work. TCW also sued its former employee and at the time, rather than roll over and take it which is something he would never do, Gundlach vowed to fight back and clear up the misconception that TCW was the victim in the situation. On the contrary, JG told people, the real victim was US taxpayers who were "promised" Gundlach's services and had to settled for a subpar bond manager when his relationship with the firm was terminated. Gundlach ultimately emerged victorious* and perhaps even more satisfying to The Pope was the number of TCW employees and clients who followed him en masse to his new company, the aptly named DoubleLine Capital. We're not sure how you celebrated last night's hugely significant anniversary, but we do know how Gundlach did: