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Party At The Manse

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Harbinger Capital, run by Philip Falcone, was short Bear from last summer until Monday. Obviously, they just made a truckload of money, and obviously Falcone’s going to want to party. How convenient that he just bought the old Penthouse spread on 67th street, the perfect venue for a bacchanal like this. Everyone's going to be there, including the Bear guys. Alan Schwartz will unfortunately not be able to attend, as he’s scheduled to give a repeat of his CNBC interview from last week, and he really can’t afford to pass up paying gigs. Jimmy Cayne will be brought out and roasted like a suckling pig, and even Charlie Gasparino will be making shameless use of his press pass to gain entry. The invite says “8 pm until ???” but Falcone’s old and will probably be kicking people out around 2. Luckily, Jamie Dimon has graciously offered to host after-hours at 383 Madison, noting on the e-vite, “I can do whatever the fuck I want with this place, I own this bitch. Piss on the walls for all I care. Just kidding, I do care, I told you that yesterday. But I really think the only way we're going to make this "merger" work is by tearing this thing down and starting fresh so, I'm just say, if you have to relieve yourself, don't let common decency stop you. All you'd be doing is what J to the Cay has been doing for the past 20 years.”