Musical Layoffs: UBS
Back in December, we floated the idea that any company looking to reduce headcount ought to get creative about it. Performance is very hard to quantify, and if you’ve got send thousands of people packing, why not have some fun with your firings? Our suggestions were: 1. A giant game of Assassin and 2. Some sort of survival challenge revolving around a lethal strain of syphilis. No one took the (genius) idea seriously. Until now.
UBS apparently sent out a company-wide email yesterday to recruit employees for its first inaugural Rock Band team, which will supposedly compete against other businesses. Auditions are being held today at 5 in the UBS cafeteria. Sounds like fun, doesn’t it? Yeah, until you realize that this whole thing is a guise for preselecting people for upcoming layoffs. At least that's what it sounds like to us. The only question is, will team members be given the benefit of the doubt (and employment) until they lose to Uncle Jim's Hardware? Or are people getting the axe the moment they show up for tryouts?
